i cut my wrists
because it's something i couldn't resist
i cut my thighs
because of all your lies
Your love decayed
and i guess that's why you didn't stay
You made me feel vulnerable and pathetic
but don't worry, i get it.
i never thought it'd become this bad
i never thought you'd make me this sad
I've lost all hope
dangling from this rope
I've lost all feeling
from attempted healing
"It's okay to reach out," they said.
"Don't be afraid," they said.
"We're here for you," they said.
"You're not alone," they said.
but through it all,
i hear your words instead.
You're the darkness i see
The insecurities i feel
The blades i use
The pain to my abuse
i'm trying to get rid of You
of all the pain You've brought
of all Your negative thoughts
"You can't get rid of me that easily," You said.
"it was worth the try," i said.
how could something so small
Have such a big affect on me at all?
And how dare You?
How Dare You?!
tell me I'm suicidal with everything I do?
How dare You hurt me
And tell me I'm crazy?
You have No right
contributing to every sleepless night
And oh You filled me up with rage
constantly trapping me inside Your dark filled cage
I Hate You!
And every other inhibition you bring!
You're the reason for my limited days
You're the reason for my troubles yesterdays
You're the emptiness
and the loneliness
I feel
You're the tears to my cries
The words to my lies
The sharpness to my blade
The rain on my parade
The evil inside my mind
The hurting I always seem to find
The pain and sorrow to my past
and my happiness that just doesn't seem to last.
If only you caught me with that knife
Maybe . . .
Just maybe...
I'd still be alive.
