Chapter 2
" Kaylin Grace Wilson ! Where the hell have you been! You are supposed to come home straight after school and get started on homework! You are gunna fail 9th grade!" My dad was yelling at the top of his lungs. I closed my eyes and tried to talk as calmly as I could, " Im sorry dad. I went to Alex's house when I got off the bus because I needed help on homework." My dad looked at me and for a moment I thought he was going to let me off the hook. " Kaylin get your fat ass upstairs and start doing homework! The next time this happpens you will be beaten!" Again with my weight! I havent been beat since I was 10 and I didnt want to start now. I nodded my head. Before I knew it my dad had my chin in his hand and was making me look into his eyes. " I tell you something and all I get is a nod? Say yes Sir! I will be treated with respect!" My dad then slapped my face and I ran upstairs. As soon as I got to my room I closed the door and locked it. I walked over to the mirror crying. I had a red hand print on my face that stung so bad that my face was almost numb. I sat on my bed still looking in the mirror. I am so ugly. I cant do anything right. No wonder Aaron likes Alex. Alex has beautiful blonde hair that cascades down her back like a waterfall. While my brown naturally curly hair just sits there. Alex is skinny and is 5'8. Im a little bit bigger than Alex and Im 5'5. Alex is smart and sporty. Im some what smart and not sporty what so ever. I started crying even more. Then my phone rings. Oh great! I look at the caller ID. It read unknown number so taking a chance I answer. " Hello?" I say in the happiest voice I can muster. I hear laughing then Caleb say, " Yeah she is so ugly! I dont get why she even has friends ! I bet Alex is just pretending to be her friend cause she feels bad for her. Kaylin? You listening? Yeah were talking about you." I stop breathing and listened to everyone else all the call laughing. I hear them say " Yeah she is a slut' and " She just needs to die because no one likes her anyway". I just sat there with the phone still pressed up to my ear. " You know Kaylin? Why are you friends with Alex? It must be hard to see guys fall for her instead of you. I bet it kills you to watch Aaron fall all over her and look at her like she is the only girl in the world." Caleb's words stabbed into my heart like a knife. I finally hung up the phone and bursted out into tears. He is right I need to die. I deserve to die. I have nothing to live for. I love Aaron. But he will never love me. No one ever will. I walked into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I feel like I cant breathe like I have a huge growing hole in my chest. I need something to get my minnd off the pain I feel inside. I open up my medicine cabnet and see my razor sitting there. I grab it. I started taking it apart and got the blade out. It was tiny and as thick as a piece of paper. I had read about cutting before, Its a way some people get there stress out. A way to get thier mids off things that are bothering them. I sit down on the toilet with the blade in my right hand. Just one cut. One time thats all I need. It will help. Only one time. I took the blade and put it on my left wrist. I sliced across my wrist and watch the blood bead up. Like Caleb's words cut through me. Then it started to run down my arm. It felt so good. It helped so much. I did it again, and again. I saw all the blood pouring down my arm. Seeing the blood was some how comforting. " Kaylin Grace!" My dad's voice boomed from outside the bathroom. He started banging on the door. I took a towel from beside the toilet and started to wipe off the blood. " Yes sir?" I said calmly, trying to slow my breathing down. " Im taking your brother to dinner we will be back soon." My dad always takes my brother out. Mason is 7 and always gets what he wants. My parents love him more. " Okay I will just be here doing homework!" I answered. I wait till I hear my dad shut the door then I get up with the blade still in my hand and go to my room. I reach under my bed and grab my lock box. I undo the lock, take a piece of tape, and tape the blade to the top of it. I look at my arm, the cuts a little puffy and stinging. It felt so good. It helped so much. I felt so relaxed. I will never cut myself again though, it was a one time thing.
