My Journal

1: Loneliness

I know you probably won't understand but...

Don't you sometimes just wake up and wish there was someone next to you to make you feel better? Someone that made you love yourself and told you that everything would be fine?

That's how I feel everyday. I have no friends...its hard to admit but I have no friends at all. I feel hated by everyone. I suck at making friends in real life I'm so awkward it's frustrating. I'm 13 btw...im in 7th grade. No ONE cares about me

I have self harmed before. When I was 11 in 6th grade is when I started to get depression and that's when I started it. I tried to kill myself by overdosing on pain killer 3 times.  I failed every single time I would just throw up. I went to counseling but that never helped.

I always hated myself because I couldn't meet people's expectations and I was always the one people never wanted to be with I never understood why... I feel like a failure. I just want someone to love me. My father abuses me and curses at me and so does my brother. I just want someone to care for me.

I was 2 months clean from cutting until 2 days ago my whole arm is covered now and the scars from before are permanent. Now I have to hide it from my parents before they hit me for it again... I just want someone to help me love myself