Country Born, City Raised

second chance

After first semester report cards were issued Yanne and I both were put on academic probation. You had to.maintain a certain GPA to remain at the school and this was our final chance to bring our grades up. I still got up late every day, missing my first class. Even though Esha and I didnt have any classes together second semester I still met up at her house and rode to school on the bus with her. I hated my first hour class. It was on the sixth floor and boring. It just seemed like I would never catch up and didnt care if I did. Right before the semester final test, I got home and Mama standing in the door and not looking happy and she was looking at me hard. As I entered the door she asked me who Ms. Cota was? She is my History teacher I responded with fear. Ms Cota called the house to tell Mama that if I didnt pass the final with an A I would get an F in her class. I had never had an F on my report card and I was determined to not have one either. I studied til about 3 in the morning and was on time doe class. I ended up with a C in the class. I was proud of myself but definitely not happy with myself. I knew I could do better and was going to. I joined the basketball team giving me something to do after school but I only got to play in one game and scored only 3 points. I came to the team late and by then coach had already had her roster set. I felt like I was unable to keep up; like everything I knew was irrelevant. I had never played team ball and maybe that was the difference.

As second semester began I was determined to get back on the ball. I ended up with a 2.3 GPS. The lowest I had ever had. I had pretty much the same courses just the second semester of them. I pushed myself hard da we to get up in the bbn morning and catch the bus on time. Most time I made it and sometimes I didnt. I really enjoyed biology but I got bored really quickly. School just didnt seem the same. I ended up with 1.8 gpa and had transfer to a regular high school in my neighborhood. I was so disappointed in myself. The worst part was I disappointed Mama.

During the summer's I worked for the SYETP. The summer youth employment program was a training program that gave youths a job for the summer doing different ypes of community services. You had to fit certain criteria like be age 14 and your family has to be considered low income. I fit both categories because I was 15 and Mama didnt have a job. I was so happy to be working because I could buy my own clothes and everything but Mama was on top of all of that. Whenever payday came Mama was up bright and early like it was her payday. My check generally was the same every week and Mama always needed 'her cut' which was usually about half or more if she desired. So it basically felt.like I was working so I could pay her. I didnt mind helping out the house but I was only 15. I could only do so much. If I wanted to do something for myself I had to do it before I got home and lie and tell Mama that my check was short or my boss messed up my check. This was the first summer I was able to buy my own school clothes and shoes. Since Tip and I pretty much shared clothes, I took her with me and so we could hang out away from the house. I felt so independent not having to wait on Mama to buy me some clothes. I could buy what I wanted and didnt have to worry about the price because I put everything in the layaway and could pay it off over time. We grabbed some hot dogs from the stand in the mini mall before heading home.

Getting up everyday was like i was still in school. I clocked in every morning at 830 am and I got off work at 330 every day and as soon as I got home I changed clothes and hit the street to play some basketball. I played ball from the time I got home until the sun went down. Some night I would just shoot baskets under the street light just to clear my mind. I usually didnt go in the house til after midnight on those nights. The fourth of July was next week and myfav uncle had made plans to come all the way from NC and visit us. It was the day before the holiday and it we were in the midst of a very bad thunderstorm. Winds were tearing limbs from trees and debris was flying everywhere. Luckily no one was hurt. A few trees fell on some houses but no one was injured. The following evening while we were tracking our Uncles route, Tip and I were outside playing with the neighborhood kids. I was sitting on the porch with Mamas friends daughter and Mama and her friend were across the street smoking drinking and chilling with a few other friends in the lot next to a house. As I looked over to see what Tip and the gang was doing when I fought a glimpse of Tip arguing with the neighbors son Laron. Tip could hold her own but I didnt like for anyone to mess with her. They were face to face when the next thing I know he pushed Tip. Tip took a swing and missed; did a whole 360 before falling to the ground. I quickly stood up. I told the lil girl I was watching not to leave the porch and I went next door. I stood in Larons face and dared him to hit me. He argued about how Tip hit him first and just as he was finishing his sentence I grabbed him between his legs, picked him up and body slammed him onto a piece of brick cinder block. As he was trying to get up I bring my first all the way back then swung hitting right in his left eye. He jumped up fast and took off crying in his house. I asked Tip was she ok before I headed back on the porch. By the time my butt hit the steps Larons' momma and fat sister came rushing out of their door. His mom was very religious but his sister on the other hand was not. She picked up a big stick and began walking toward us kids as if she was going to hit on one us. Just as she got louder Mama and her friends heard the commotion and proceeded across the street. Mama asked Larons mom what the problem was. She pushed Larin to the front where his eye was hanging over. His face was bloody and he was crying uncontrollably. Mama made it clear that Laron had no right to even try to hit Tip and he got what he deserved. After some heated back and forth Larons mom made it clear that he could not play with us anymore. My uncle arrived the next morning and we were overjoyed. Laron made it a point to let my uncle know that I punched him in the eye. My uncle also made it clear only a coward would hit a girl. My uncle brought my grandma with him. This was the first time she had ever been out of NORTH Carolina in her life. Her and Mama didnt really get along. Whenever they were in the same room all they did was argue; mainly because grandma always wanted to be her Mama and Mama felt like she didnt need any advice from any body especially not her Mother. Regardless of how.much they fought I always knew grandma loved us and wanted nothing but the best for Mama. Grandma didnt have the opportunity to raise Mama because she was a woman of her own mind and being young, children definitely was not her first priority. Mama always griped about how bad her upbringing was because Grandma was never around but I believe Grandma was trying to make amends and Mama just wasnt ready to do that. Grandma was older now and she had diabetes. The doctors had to amputate her leg because of gangrene in her leg. Nevertheless I was gonna enjoy her visit because I truly loved my grandma. I even let her comb my hair. She put it in 5 big fat plays. She said she didnt like my hair in a ponytail. I tried to put a hat on but Grandma took it and said only boys wear ball caps.