avec tu

A/N: 'Avec Tu' is written for a one-shot contest, the characters Alyssa and Warren are the respective property of Sam Madison in her novel 'The Heartbroken Heartbreaker'. I never could have completed this without the help and support of my friend, Pessimist. Enjoy! x

The fragile lines and cracks in his psyche could not be bordered with the existence of intense emotions which had not as yet been placed or labelled with an exact name, it was as though he was in a state of coma; neither fully alive nor fully dead. The impending choice of labelling the farfetched thoughts came with a sense of dread which could not be washed away so easily. He wished to reach out to them, feel them even though the bizarre range of emotions were strangers to him, but in time those feelings acted as an ointment fixing the cracks of his subconsciousness and the same cracks which had been etched onto his heart. Slowly, the array of emotions could be pinpointed to a feeling of “trust”, another word which had not been so familiar with him or his mind.

Upon the sight of her, his muscles shifted and contracted in different ways, sometimes forming a smile and other times causing him to shudder at the amount of frenzy waves just the sight of her could send through his body. 

His heart palpitated at the sudden feeling of longing, as he strode onto the pathway which seemed to go on forever, in a snakelike pattern; zigzagging in utmost uncertainty. The bitter wind caressed his naked skin with knife-like accuracy, congealing his breath for a few moments, as a fleeting puff of smoke evaporating time and time again. Even the black blazer he wore seemed like thin silk in front of the ever penetrating and piercing cold, which shrouded the hustle and bustle of New York City. The echoing sound of gravel crunching beneath his boots mirrored the rapid beating of his heart, dreading the moment of having met her again after what seemed like years. Laughing dryly, he shoved his hands into the deep and warm pockets of his pants; diving into the sea of thought which inhabited his mind, but he was reeled out forcefully by the impending aura of her. The corners of his lips upturned into a half smile when she came into view.

‘Hey Aly,’ he had been the first to speak and shatter the mount of silence which enveloped them, the words came with a hint of fluidity, causing him to bite on his lip and anticipate the reaction which would gradually etch onto her placid features. A sudden sense of embracing her overtook him, taking his already fixated brain into overdrive. He held back.

‘Hey’, she whispered, placing a small peck on his cheek, ‘I have a date waiting for me at Starbucks.’

The words hit him as though he'd been standing on a beach, just waiting for the tsunami waves to hit him hard and wash him away along the shore. He had been expecting those words from her, one day or another but never so soon; the walls rid up back again, guarding him and placing a façade mask on his face. The same walls which Alyssa had climbed so cleverly and made a special area which would be reserved just for her, inside his heart. With the façade, his lips twitched in an almost robotic smile. The misery mixed with a hint of betrayal could not be seen upon his face, the emotions which he hid in a place of vile and rotten darkness were thrown back into their prison; shutting them off for an eternity.

‘Is he cute?’ In midst of the conflict which clutched onto his heart, the mask played out well; concealing the emotions in a swirl of damp and dry smiles, mixed with an ever undiluted feeling of sadness and guilt. The little façade which he had gotten quite used to, the sense of pure sanctuary where no one could tread, flooded his thoughts. His heart had strung onto the bond of their friendship which bordered on the non-existent now it was as though the glass-like bond shattered into the black hole of his impassive façade.

Either it was as though he didn't want to be hit with the impending thought of doom and suffering which hid inside him or he didn't want to face the guilt he would see plastered on Alyssa’s worrying features; that he most possibly chose to ignore the words which she spoke in answer to his futile question. They walked side-by-side in silence, almost comprehending the aura which hung low around them in a way, consuming what little left happiness was between the ever growing ball of tension. In thoughts of diffusing the utter impalpable silence, and somehow between the spark which spread in the air due to one's hand caressing over the other; he slipped his hand into hers. Their fingers entwined, lovingly. The sheer warmth from her skin ignited a somewhat fire in the palm of his hand, and the cold eluded him as though he were the companion of the Sun. Alyssa indeed in some way resembled the Sun in his life, she enlightened the passageway on which he could fathom the little complex thing in life called love.