Contrition [Itachi Uchiha x Reader]

#25: Commemoration

"How much time do you think we'll have before they start getting suspicious?" [Name] asked, looking over at the man lying beside her. The radium numbers of the clock on the bedside table read eleven thirty p.m.

"We've already been here a week, so I'm guessing we've got a couple more days before they start asking us questions," was the reply she got.

"And here I thought the situation back home would have at least gotten better by now," she admitted. 

"I wouldn't get my hopes up. Danzō rarely ever does anything himself so if they're going to pin this on him, they're going to need a lot more than just Sai's statement. If they even managed to get him to confess."

She sighed. "Excuse me for being an optimist! But I suppose you're right. This isn't one of those movies where the villain just surrenders at the drop of a hat."

"I'm afraid not," Itachi said with a slight chuckle. "But let us, for argument sake, say that we are in a movie. Does that make us the protagonists? Because I'm anything but a hero."

[Name] turned to her side. "How much longer are you going to beat yourself up for something that wasn't even entirely your fault?"

"You don't know the whole story, [Name]."

"Evidently, neither do you."

Itachi began to protest but he was quickly silenced. "Don't even start. Let's just say, I have good instincts. Anyway, why are you so against finding out the truth?"

Itachi scoffed. "And how would I find out the truth? Are you going use hypnosis to bring forth repressed memories?"

"I don't need to hypnotize you for that," she replied with a smile. "You already know everything you need to know. Just because some things are hidden deep within your subconscious, doesn't mean they're not there. Now, I don't expect you to trust me, but I do wish you would at least try."

"Believe me [Name], if I didn't trust you, I wouldn't be here sharing a room with you much less sharing a bed. But the less you know, the better. You still have deniability. Although you just helped an undertrial escape police custody, so you're already in a heap of trouble. How much farther are you willing to go just to ease your conscience?"

[Name] apprehended him with a serious look. "My conscience?"

"Hidan. You're just trying to finish what you started."

"You and Hidan are completely different people. He was a psychopath! And what happened between Hidan and myself is in the past. It shouldn't matter anymore, especially not to you."

"Oh come on, I thought we were sharing our deepest secrets," he said, his voice dripping with bitterness. "Besides, this just as affects me as it does you. Or are you going to tell me that your reluctance to come to Yūgakure has nothing to do with it being Hidan's hometown? So much for it being in the past. You're still tormented by him even though he isn't even here."

"That's enough." Her tone was calm, yet held a dangerous edge. 

"How much longer are you going to beat yourself up for something that wasn't even entirely your fault?" he mimicked her earlier words, earning him a scowl.

"The last time I was in this town..." she said, albeit reluctantly. "...was to bury him."

"What? Why?"

"He had no family. No one came to claim to body. I figured he at least deserved a decent burial."

Itachi fully turned to his side so that the two were lying face to face. "I don't understand you."

"I suppose Miss. Uzumaki would have been able to provide you with some insight at least. I know that you were using her to spy on your brother, and sometimes even me. To be honest, I used to think that you were a decent human being. At least decent enough not to use a little girl to do your bidding."

"Are you advocating for her now? Did you ever consider the possibility that she wanted to help me?"

"She wanted to help you because she cared about you. Did you even have an inkling of affection towards her?"

"Ms. [Surname], I am a murder convict on parole. I can't afford to have inklings of affection towards anyone. For their own good."

"Their good, or yours?" 

"I thought we were talking about Hidan."

She chuckled. "Sometimes I can't help but be concerned over how alike we are, you and I. Fine, I'll entertain your questions. What would you like to know?"

"What drove you to start teaching at the University? I heard you were at the peak of your career before you took up Hidan's case."

"Did I ever tell you the story of how he died?"

"He hanged himself in his jail cell. Everyone knows that."

"Does everyone know that he asked to see me the night that he killed himself? I was his in-prison counsellor. I had done his psych eval, just like I did yours. I took up his case knowing exactly who he was. But he didn't know me. I didn't want him to."

"Over the course of time, he opened up to me. He told me about his absentee father and his mother who had died during childbirth. He was left to take care of his newborn sister, whom he said he loved very much. Days before the shooting, she had met with an accident that left her battling for her life. That was when a friend told him about the faith of Jashinism and its principle that immortality would be given to those who offered sacrifices to Jashin. It infuriated me to think that my parents were mere sacrifices to him. But he didn't know who I was, so he told me everything. Soon after his arrest, his sister died in surgery. He spent the rest of his days in solitary confinement, not interacting with a soul unless it was necessary. From time to time he asked me about the families of his victims - whether they had forgiven him or whether the world had forgotten. I didn't lie and he didn't mind."

"One day he asked to see me. He told me that he found out from a guard the truth about who I was - who my parents were. I will never forget the look on his face when he fell to his knees and apologized over and over. That was the last time I saw him alive. I heard the news from Nagato the next day. You once told me that people don't change. Perhaps he thought the same. Initially, I thought I got what I wanted. He had shown some remorse and I had gotten an apology. And as I sat there in the morgue staring at the peaceful expression on his face, I realized why my mother didn't hide in the storeroom with me. I knew the reason why my father tried to reason with a maniac pointing a gun at him. My parents died trying to save him from himself. And I had failed to do just that. I failed them. So I decided to quit. You know what they say, those who can't do, teach."

"So then...why...?"

"Why did I agree to help you?" she smiled. "You had the same look on your face the day I first met you - one of a man desperately trying to believe in the good in himself; someone who wanted to set things right. You still have that look. And the day that changes, I'll stop trying to help you."

"I should have replaced you when I had the chance," he said, smugly.

"You certainly had the opportunity."

"But I'm glad I didn't." His words were but a whisper.

"Have you actually begun to care about me?" she teased. "And here I thought you couldn't."

"Shut up or you'll be waking up next to the snake."