"Hey, let's go bowling!"
It takes every last ounce of self-control in my veins to keep me from franticly smashing against my old little Subaru's brake pedal, "What?"
"You heard me, Kels. Let's go bowl the night away, just the two of us."
Focusing on averting my attention back to the road, I mentally roll my eyes at the childish man sitting in the passenger seat beside me, "David, you're newly bed ridden. Remember? We literally had this conversation with the doctor less than ten minutes ago,"
"I remember,"
"For crying out loud then. We're driving home from the emergency room because you had a seizure."
David laughs, as if there's any humor buried beneath the topic, "So? It's my seventeenth seizure since I was diagnosed," He hurriedly turns towards the window, "And there goes the exit for the bowling alley."
"We're not going bowling!" I yell more loudly than anticipated, the shrill sounding fear in my voice echoing off the low ceiling of the vehicle.
He pauses for a moment, then drops his voice to a more soothing tone, "Calm down, Babe. I just wanted to take you out on a date," he now lowers to almost a whisper, "I had something I wanted to ask you anyway."
All of the heat in my being rushes to my face in one fatal swoop, staining my cheeks with a red hue that I know won't fade for the rest of the evening. I choke on either an imaginary object or emotion in the back of my throat and meet my other half's hope-filled eyes in the rear view mirror, "Give that up already," I squeak.
"What, proposing? Not until I get a yes."
I don't respond in fear of falling apart completely and utterly... Again.
A warm set of fingertips brush across my cheek, tucking behind my ear a stray strand of hair that had escaped my sagging ponytail. My heartbeat quickens and I want to melt into his touch, but I resist the urge and continue staring straight ahead.
"What am I doing wrong?" He asks me.
There he goes, catching me off guard again. His words violently cut into me, burying themselves in the pit of my already aching stomach. Tears well in the brims of my brown eyes at idea of him thinking he could ever not be enough for me.
"It's not tha—"
"I've tried everything," David interrupts, "I went big with proposing on the hot air balloon, you didn't say yes. Then I tried the simpler approach of a homemade candle-lit dinner, granted the main course was just microwaved mac n' cheese..."
I can't help the small smile that plays along my lips as I breathe in all of these broken memories, "You're the cutest thing ever,"
"Debatable." His ever-present smirk radiates from his fair complexion before slumping back into another more serious expression, "But look, Kels. Every single day is a questionable chance for me, and most of my hopes and dreams in life have fizzled out. I've finished the first four years of college, which is great, but I'll never make it anywhere with a career. And let's be honest, I've lost interest in all of my old hobbies because of the pain. The last thing I really want out of this world is for the love of my life to agree to marry me—even if I don't end up making it to the wedding,"
I pull my car into the driveway of David's parent's small house, put it in park, and turn to him, biting my lower lip to stop it from quivering so vigorously. Actual words fail to form on my tongue, so I just meet his gaze and absorb his cunning features. I can't always help myself from thinking about how much I'll miss him.
