Give Me Strength

Letter to him

  Hey you might not know me or even realize I exist I'm just a nobody that has been hiding behind the shadows. I've always wanted to tell you how I feel, always staring and just plainly thinking about you and nothing else. This might seem stupid and you might not feel the same but I have liked you since I first saw you. It seems as when you walk in you light up the whole room, when you come close to me my breathing stops and heart rate increases. You have this affect on me that no one seems to have, I don't know how to express it but you are the reason I still exist, seeing you everyday gives me a reason to even wake up and go to school. If you could only realize I exist and notice me it would mean so much to me...but no I'm just a shadow you don't realize is there. You prefer to look and hang out with fake people, but if you were with me it would all change I would never try to hurt you. It hurts to know that you don't see me I've always wanted to tell you this but I don't have the guts to and you probably wouldn't feel the same about me. Spilling all my emotions into this letter is so much more different then saying them face to face, your eyes are enchanting your smile is beautiful I just wish I could tell you in person hug you and do all those couple things.. but no that's just how life is because I am just a simple nobody hiding behind a shadow nobody sees in this world. Love they say it's a feeling that can't be felt just like that but why is it that everytime I see you that is all I can feel? love. The one word that has caused me to go mad because of all the thinking that the love I want can never be mine...I wish you could see that you are the person that I always focus on and think about in my head. I am thinking about you 24/7 wondering will he ever notice me? Is he thinking of me right now? Does he love me like I love him? Then my heart gets shattered when the realization hits me that you will never look at me the way I look at you that I am just another person in this world you don't seem to notice. I watch you from far trying constantly to see if you will ever notice me or see that I exist. But it will never happen you don't want a mess like me. A person that is so heartbroken by so many people that have already hurt her you don't want that you want someone to make you happy and always be by your side someone who is much better then I will ever be.

With love
-C