I have no emotion and I can't do anything about it. I don't know what happy is or sad.... or love or any emotion except emptiness and boredom. It sucks because I go to therapy and everyone else there had no emotion but they now have emotion.
Would I want emotions? That's hard to answer. I sometimes like not having emotions... but when it comes to things I need to care about....
it's difficult. My mum passed away this week and I got made fun of because it seemed like I didn't care. When I really wanted to. My mum and I were close and she and her only made me smile. She made me feel loved, but only a bit.
My dad has a drinking problem so he doesn't care much.
Watching sad movies is also difficult because I don't cry in any of the sad scenes.
I know how every emotion works, i just have none.
Everyday I get teased and called names such as "emotionless mess" or even "weirdo"
Other people make me feel uncomfortable to see them be angry or sad or happy. I'm not sure how to understand these emotions by myself. I need someone to help me understand emotions!
When will I understand any of them?
*sigh* I need to learn emotions to be useful.
To be continued