A Knight No More

The Truth

Orion's Pov

It had only been a week since the incident and I've only become even more shy towards everyone except Ratchet and Optimus. I haven't said a thing to the others, only whining and panicking inside when they said anything to me. I don't know why I'm so panicky when they try to talk to me but their voices seem a little harsh now, as if they think I think I'm too good to talk to them. But it's the opposite, I don't think I'm good enough to talk to them. I think of myself as nothing compared to them, I doubt they've ever had an evil goddess brainwash them to do her bidding. Sometimes I just sit in my vehicle mode or lay in my room and listen to music, occasionally blasting metal for Miko since I've learned that she loves metal, and to be honest, I don't really mind it. But, I've found that my favorite song is Transcendence by Alasen, I find the bass rumbling through my frame very pleasant and relaxing. It's almost like a massage to be honest, sometimes I just lay on the berth and let my engine run while my tires spin to get the vibrations.

But, nothing is enough to comfort me enough to talk to the others, nothing. Nothing can make me comfortable enough to talk to anyone except for Optimus and Ratchet, I'm not sure why. They haven't told the others about it yet though, even though I've told them that they can. I guess their waiting for something. I'm not sure what, but Quintessa hasn't shown herself at all for awhile, and I want it to stay that way. Occasionally Optimus would just lay with me in silence, holding my servo and occasionally pressing a kiss to my helm, which I absolutely loved.

One day, I was sitting in my vehicle mode, listening to music, when Arcee came over and knocked on the top of my vehicle mode. I turned off my music and slowly transformed, sitting down immediately as I looked up to Arcee. She glared back at me and crossed her arms, I gave a soft whimper.

"Why won't you talk to any of us? Are you too arrogant to talk to any of us? Do you think we're lower than you and that we're not good enough to talk to? You only talk to Optimus and Ratchet, and they're higher ranked than any of us." She said, and I teared up, not sure how to answer, so I simply looked down and shook my helm.

"I don't think I'm good enough for you guys... something happened a few weeks ago, and I want to talk about it, but I don't know how... and I don't know what you guys will think of me if I do tell..." I muttered, pulling my knees to my chest and hugging them, still not looking at Arcee. It's been so long since I've even faced a femme, I didn't know how to talk to anyone other than mechs. Femmes are more clever and more intricate than mechs. She hummed for a moment before sitting down next to me and resting a servo on my shoulder.

"Can you tell me the whole story? Of what happened to you during the war?" She asked, and I shuddered a little. But, I nodded.

"It'll take a few hours to tell if that's alright. I remember it all vividly so just bear with me if I struggle to keep my composure." I said, and she nodded. So, I started at when I first landed on earth, looking for the AllSpark. The others gathered around to listen, including Optimus, Ratchet, and the children, even Agent Fowler eventually, but I barely took notice, my optics staying closed. I told them every major battle, major injury, and death of a friend and comrade, and by the time I got to when Sentinel showed up, I had tears endlessly streaming down my face, and I tried my best not to sob or stutter. I told them about Sam, Mikaela, Simmons, Lennox, Eps, Sentinel's betrayal, the Fallen, Megatron dying and coming back to life twice, how I died and came back to life, basically twice, as well.

I told them about Cade, Tessa, Shane, how I remembered my past as a Knight of Cybertron, about Cemetery Wind, about Grimlock and and Dinobots, Joshua, about Sir Edmund, Cogman, and Vivian. But, the thing I struggled with most was Quintessa. I'm still terrified of her and I heard her yelling at me in my head to not talk about her. I told them about how she had brainwashed me and took over my mind, telling me to kill instead of protect, to do her bidding, and about how Cybertron was technically saved but was taken over again by Quintessa after everything, tasked with searching for the Staff again to kill Unicron, and I ended, hours later, on how I landed here and found bots I could trust with humans who weren't trying to murder me and my friends and a government who actually accepted Cybertronians, even if there was casualties and even though the earth was literally Unicron, like it was in my own universe. I didn't know how to react to kindness like that anymore, it had been so long since I had been accepted by more than just a few humans. All I wanted was some place I could call home again... and I how had a family and friends again...

No one knew what to say once I finished, and I sat there, trembling as I tried not to break down into a panic attack because I was really on the edge of one. Finally, I felt arms wrap around me, and I looked up, seeing that Optimus had hugged me, and I gradually felt everyone else join in. Bee, Bulkhead, Ratchet, Arcee, Jack, Raf, Miko, even Agent Fowler gave me a gentle pat to the arm.

"Thank you... all of you..." I whispered, letting tears freely fall to the ground. Optimus gently squeezed me and I nuzzled by face to his chest, listening to his calm sparkbeat. They aren't afraid of me... they aren't afraid! I have family again, bots and humans I can trust. I feel... loved...

I felt a warmth in my spark that I hadn't felt in so long, it felt so good, it made me feel overwhelming joy. I loved it, and I wanted more... A soft purr came from my throat, and I felt a nuzzle against my cheek. I looked over and saw Bee nuzzling against my side. I miss my Bee, but I guess I'm adopting this one if Optimus hasn't already. I smiled and chuckled at the memory of Tessa being a bit of a stubborn brat, and Cade complaining. I had that same thing with Bumblebee when I raised him. I picked him up off the street when he was like 8, if he were human, and raised him, having to deal with the struggle of him being a little bratty, angsty teen too. Cade was an excellent dad with what he had, doing everything he could to make Tessa happy and safe even if he was severely in debt and had to deal with all of the war scrap after he picked me up and reactivated me.

I gently pet over Bee's helm, hearing him give a low, happy buzz. Then I heard Bulkhead softly chuckle and tilted my helm a little.

"What's so funny?" I asked as Bulkhead kept laughing.

"I'd love to see you in action. It'll be pretty neat to see you tear apart Ol' Buckethead." He chuckled, and I heard the kids join in. That gave me an idea and I smirked a bit.

"Next time Megatron decides to mess with you guys, bring me along. Maybe I can end this war once and for all." I said, letting out a low growl. And conveniently, the alarm went off right then.