KIDS

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Kids
Making stupid jokes and cussing each other out like there's no tomorrow
Looking at memes
Joking about our lives as if we could just get it back like a lost toy
Having fun or at least pretending to do so
Trying desperately to get a good grade but it never comes
Then it leaves
It's gone forever
You either wasted it or you made the most out of it
Though there are people who still act like six year olds when they don't get their way
In the end
We are still kids
Maybe not shitting ourselves
Or being a kissass it the teacher so you can tattle on the others
But
Still kids
In that stage of life where your mood swings could send someone out the fucking window
Or where the gossip is all you need to know
The stage of life of try things for the first time
Not elementary things but new and horrible things
Though sometimes they aren't so horrible
But still
We are only kids
We may be fucked up
We may be dumbasses who don't know shit
We may even be the most popular person at school
But
We're still kids
We all have problems
We all suffer at least once in a while
But we have our pride and at least a little self confidence to get us through middle and high school
But some don't
And some do
It's an "IF" situation
Like If I tried this it If I did that
If this happened and If it didn't
If I was fine If I wasn't
But what the fuck do people do about the kids that aren't alright
What does alright even mean to us anymore
It's just a word
Defining if we are "Alright"
How does that even work
I genuinely don't know
But I am just a kid
I'm not a smartass
Just an angsty Kid
For fucks sake I can't even understand equations in math
Not understanding to the point where I wanna cry
I just wanna cry but the tears don't come
Are they built up inside me so that if I did cry everything would be coming out at once
Is that Okay
Is anyone Okay
Who can say they are Okay
Who
Please tell me
We all have the major stressors in life that make it not Okay
Like big projects and fuck all
But it's every night
And every weekend
Where does the time go
Where does the time to still be a Kid go
Is there any left at this point
Would you still be a kid
Dear readers
Would you want to be a kid
Reliving all the fucking stress and risky things that could set you on the wrong track for the rest of your LIFE
Damn the people that say they want to be kids again
It fucking sucks
Like how nasty people can be
Even close people
I just want to do something without getting judged by my family
Jut because I listen to different music
I feel like they wouldn't
Only a close person
I want a companion
Someone I could talk to for hours on end
Tell them what's bothering me and they could do the same to me
But I'm alone
Yeah I have siblings
But
There aren't kids
They're adults
They wouldn't understand
They don't don't know what it's like
At least not anymore
Because they aren't kids
They have their own problems
Hey can't deal with a bitchy teenager
Because they don't have the time to actually ask if something is wrong
They have to deal with the adult problems
While I'm stuck being a kid
Dealing with kid problems
Just hoping things will be alright
But If they are what happens then
Do I just become genuinely happy
Or does it take time
I'm genuinely confused but
I'm supposed to be
Right?
I'm supposed to be the one to ask questions
But then if I ask too many questions at I considered a dumbass for not understanding after a few tries
Or am I just "learning"
Do I just move on from that
Or do I stay and ponder it over a bit more
Do I try to fit in
Even if I am the complete opposite form normal
Even if it means giving up the things you most love
Like your life
Your family
Friends
Getting into that one college you were so desperate to get good grades for
What's the limit
Is there one
Do I just go back to being emo and trying to fit in with those people
Or
Not
Do I just seclude myself even more
Do I try to find good people
I have
But
What about introducing those people to my parents
Or other friends
Do I just take their judgement
Or do I stand up for my friends and take the blows



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