Oh, Captains! My Captains! {Star Wars | Star Trek}

Oh, Captains! My Captains!

A long time ago where man has not boldly gone before in a galaxy far, far away...

"Do you think we can land the Enterprise here, sir? She's a bit big in comparison to these other vessels, Captain."

"Put her down, Mr. Chekov."

"Aye, captain."

Various commands were shouted across the USS Enterprise as she gracefully landed at a docking station on the planet Tatooine. The crew was almost a year into their five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before. But now, it was time for a well-deserved intermission in honour of their numerous explorations.

"First round of drinks is on me!" Captain Kirk screeched to his crew. They happily reciprocated his enthusiasm with shouts and cheers.

"Well, captain," Uhura spoke cynically, "You have to find a bar first before you can drink a drop of liquor."

"Spock, can you locate me a place that holds alcohol within its perimeters since Lieutenant Uhura is already trying to kill the mood," Kirk skipped over to the vulcan's workspace on the command deck, ignoring Uhura's burning glare.

"Captain, there is a place not to far from here if we head due East through this town."

Kirk gave Spock a quick slap on the back before rallying his crew for a night of much needed relaxation, "What are we waiting for? I promised you all a round of drinks and I must fulfill my promise... and my thirst!"

Meanwhile...

"Come on, Chewy. I will behave myself at the Cantina, so why don't you go and work some more on the Falcon's hyperdrive."

Chewbacca shook his head in disappointment as he headed to the Millennium Falcon while Han Solo made his way to the infamous Mos Eisley Cantina, "What would you like to drink, sir?"

"Whatever is strongest, honey."

The bartender smiled politely at the captain as she rummaged through the shelves of drinks. Almost a month has passed since Solo had once again escaped the grasp of the ruthless Jabba the Hutt. Countless bounty hunters were scouring the galaxy to collect the riches that would come with the delivery of the captain alive. Now he was back where it all started on Tatooine, but he could care less. The Falcon desperately needed some tune ups and he was craving a drink.

"Here you go, honey. Enjoy," the bartender placed Solo's drink in front of him, winking and turning with a swing of her hips.

Han Solo erased the lustful thoughts in his mind and took a big gulp from his mystery drink. He cringed at the fowl taste of the liquor and how it stung his throat, "Well, it sure is strong. I'll give her that."

"What are you having there?"

"No clue, son. All I know is it's strong and sure does have one hell of a kick."

The man motioned the bartender, "Yeah, can I get what he's having, sweetheart? Thank you."

"Name's James T. Kirk," he stuck out his hand.

Solo shook his hand firmly, "Han Solo, kid. Where you from?" 

"Let's just say I'm from out of town, and yourself?"

He smirked, "I'm where ever the bounty hunters are not, kid."

The bartender arrived swiftly and gave Kirk his drink, while the two completely ignored her fit body and obvious advances, "Bounty hunters? You some sort of villain?"

"No, I'm just so good-looking that looks are killing the ladies left and right, kid. The Hutt isn't so happy when his little servants come crawling after me. Hell, I don't blame them," Solo took another sip of his drink as he gave a sly smile to an unsuspecting lady.

"That's a lot of confidence for one man," Kirk grinned.

Solo laughed heartedly, "I don't need a lick of confidence, kid. All I need is my charm, and I know I'm in for the win."

"I can drink to that."

The bartender poured them both a shot of a glowing green liquid. They threw it back down their throats quick to lessen the almost unbearable burning sensation, "Why the hell do we keep drinking this?"

"Because we're men, kid. Man up for another one."

The bartender repeated her earlier actions as did the captains.

"What business do you have here on Tatooine, kid?"

Kirk wiped his mouth and spoke loudly, "This is more of a quick vacation, no business really. I thought my crew deserved a breather before we embarked on another mission."

"You're a captain I take it, kid?" 

"Yes, sir. The USS Enterprise is my one and only love," Kirk gave a small smile at all the memories that were made upon the spaceship, the terrible and the wonderful, when a cute number caught his eye, "but that lady over there might also be my one and only love."

Han Solo raised an eyebrow at the young captain. "Well, just for tonight anyways."

"That's what I thought, kid," Solo chuckled lightly at Kirk's amusing personality.

"You know what, Solo?"

"What don't I know, kid?" Han took another sip of the horrid liquor.

"You need a break from all these bounty hunters, man. You look so stressed."

Solo gave a light chuckle, "Kid, that would be the day when the perfect woman existed -- ain't going to happen."

"I'm serious. What if you were to cruise around with my crew on the Enterprise for a couple of days? We won't be leaving this system for quite awhile, and you probably know your way around, maybe even some good hangouts."

Solo hummed in consideration of the captain's offer, "Thanks for the proposition, kid, but I got my own little beauty to take care of."

"You're a captain, too? Well, I'll be damned," Kirk spoke, astonished.

"Yes, sir, the Millennium Falcon. You think a man like me wouldn't have his own ship?"

"Still, you should consider my offer," Krik paused playfully, "captain. We leave at the break of dawn tomorrow. Offer is still on the table whenever you finally come to your senses."

"I'll think about it, kid."

"Until tomorrow morning, my captain," Kirk stumbled as he bowed, completely inebriated.

Solo helped the drunken captain to his feet, "Sure thing, kid. I'll show you where to find all the pretty women in this system."

Kirk attempted to whistle and hoot, but Scotty led him out of the bar before he could make a complete fool of himself.

And here they were: two captains to venture together through the galaxy to explore strange new worlds, protect the galaxy from her enemies, and at the end of the day, hit on every woman in the galaxy because, I mean...

it's Han Solo and James T. Kirk for goodness sake!

THE END