You Stole My Heart

Entry

To the boy who stole my heart:

As little as we may know about the other, we have history. Starting from when we were just two little kids, merely five years old. We went to the same kindergarten, and that's when I first laid my eyes on you. Turns out next year, I'd be moving to another school district. Little would I have known that we'd meet yet again, in middle school.

I spent the entirety of 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th grade pining over you. Or maybe it was who I made you out to be, overthinking our small conversations during our shared classes, and our brief skin-to-skin contact. You see people forget the things you say, and things you do. But, the way you make them feel, can brand their minds and hearts. As you did mine.

And in my case, you made me feel wanted and appreciated. Maybe you only liked me as just friends, but I craved for something more than that. All these years I wanted nothing more than to know the feeling of holding your hand, or going up on my tiptoes and planting a soft kiss on your cheek, the one with the cute beauty mark. Just your goofy smile could make my heart flutter, giving me a sickening feeling in my stomach. Those damned butterflies.

I found myself developing deeper feelings for you. It scared the crap out of me, thinking you couldn't possibly feel the same way towards me. I never said anything to you, because the you I imagined myself with at night ,in my dreams, felt real. I was content with that boy. That is until the end of 8th grade.

Being the end of middle school and moving on to high school, I wanted to start off fresh. I decided I'd confess my attraction towards you--with the help of my best friend of course. So, we not so slyly dragged you into the parking lot of Oaks Park. I told you I had to tell you something. You looked confused. I felt as if I'd puke my stomach contents onto the concrete. Feeling quite ballsy, I looked up into your eyes and told you that I liked you. A lot... Your face resembled that of a gaping fish out of water. Unfortunately, my bravery was short lived. And as soon as those three words left my mouth, I fled from the parking lot. Leaving without giving you the chance to respond, or possibly laugh and reject me. It's something I kind of regret doing.

I've liked you for so long, and I've yearned to know what it's like for us two to be together. Unfortunately, I can't keep thinking with my heart. It's time to use my head now, to avoid this pang in my heart thinking, "What if...?". I'm done pining over you.

Love,

Your not so secret admirer