Chapter 4: Home

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School trekked along, still a continuous headache. With some generous persuasion from Coen and Wesley, I eventually agreed to become his new tutor. Our study sessions after school became the only reason I even looked forward to going to school. Coen was a warmth to be around.

"Oh? Well, why don't you just go fuck yourself?!" Ella's voice scattered across the lunchroom.

We all turned our heads towards the table. Coen was standing up, tray in hand, hands moving furiously as he talked back at her. From what I could make out of the gradually louder argument ensuing, Ella was mad at him because of me.

"If you want to fraternize with that bitch, then you can go sit with that bitch!" She stood up slamming her hands on the table.

"You act like I'm a cheater! We're friends for Christ's sake!" His voice bowed from anger to disbelief.

"She punched me in the face!"

"As if it wasn't fucking deserved?!" Ella's eyes shifted in response, looking apologetic.

As much as I hoped I would enjoy this debacle. I couldn't. It wasn't the breaking up fantasy I had dreamt of. It was sad. Heartbreaking. It was clear through their body language that they were finally accepting the inevitable: they just weren't made to work out.

"What are we doing Coen? It's over. We had a good run while it lasted babe, but I think we both know it's time to let each other go." She quieted down. The lunchroom was still silent. She pushed the bill of his purple fitted cap up so she could plant a kiss on his forehead before hastily exiting the cafeteria. Her black waves swinging.

Coen slung his backpack against his shoulders, mumbling to himself as he and Dominic made their way over to our table. The Lunchroom went back to their gossiping conversations.

"Room for one more?" Coen attempted to let out a smile. But it was no use. Any happy emotion on his face right now would be forced.

I took my foot off the empty chair, smiling up at him so he could sit down between Wes and me. He lazily threw his assigned literature book to the table. His backpack carelessly falls to the ground next to his now slouching figure in the black chair.

I looked at him, his lips in a slight pout, his hands fidgeting and dual-colored eyes looking around. He was going to cry. Placing my hand on top of his knee to stop him from shaking, he looked up at me as a tear fell down his cheek.

After that, there was no escaping the rainfall. His right hand rushed to his face. Rubbing harsh against his flushed cheeks to whip the tears away.

Everyone sat in silence.

"Do you wanna talk about it? I'm all ears." I rubbed a soft circle onto his back. "I'm just frustrated. Embarrassed. And so. Fucking. Exhausted..."




"Are you ready to study? For once I'll be able to pay attention in English now that Ella and I won't be sitting next to each other anymore."

"You're oddly happy for getting dumped in front of the whole senior class."

He chuckled. "We dumped each other. Plus, we all know it was bound to happen at some point." The optimist smile faded quickly. Awkwardness ensued between the two of us. I spoke up to refresh the air. "Can we stop at the vending machine first? I'm kind of thirsty." He simply nodded yes.

"I have a quick question. Don't wanna seem too forward though."

"Shoot."

He turned his head to glance at me. His eyes quizzical. "Why do you and Ella not like each other exactly? I'm honestly curious. She never explained it to me whenever I asked."

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