My Letter To You. : To All the Boys I've Loved Entry.

Dear...

Dear Orange,

        Well, if you are actually reading this, then we are either together, or you stumbled upon this.

     I first saw you 8th grade. You were in the middle school band and I nudged my friend sitting on my right. 

I said, "Who is that?" Truth is I was actually told your name, yet, I quickly forgot it as I didn't have that good of a memory back then. 

My friend quickly asked who I was talking about and finally she pointed at you. She said, "Oh, that's orange."

I didn't know it then but, I would soon come to like you, a lot. When we first talked I believe it was in drama club, 8th grade, it was just a short conversation, if you can even call it that, about the scenes, I may not remember what we talked about but, I knew that this crush was going to crush me.

You probably don't remember this but, they had assigned roles and an extensive amount of people dropped out of drama. Leaving plenty of open roles, and I had 3.

Originally, my sister asked you to play the dad but, you thought the stress was too great and asked me, in the nicest way possible if I could. 

Maybe it was just flattery.

Maybe it was kindness.

You told me that you believed and in me and even if you could learn all the lines, that I would still do so much better than you. 

So, I took the role. I'm not even mad about it, because if it made you less stressed that was worth it. Mostly because it wasn't anything hard for me to memorize but, you hadn't ever acted before.

I don't know if you know this but, many things happened between us that you weren't even around for. 

Like the conversations with my sister about how all the girls in dram thought you were hot and they ALL had crushes on you.

Like how I tried to deny it all the time.

Like how everybody shipped us, including your friends.

Like how destroyed and tried not to cry at homecoming, freshman year because that was when I found out you had gotten a girlfriend. 

Like how for the rest of the night I had a fake smile plastered on my face.

Then the doubt poured in. Was I good enough? She was and still is a lot prettier than me. 

I'm too fat. Too ugly. Too useless.

Then, I felt happiness. 

It was happiness for you both. You both looked happy and I accepted it. In fact, I tried not to like you anymore but, we all know how that went.

Then I found out you guys broke up. 

I fell all over again. I realized that I loved you since I met you. 

I love your little quirks, like loving geeky shows like me, your intelligence fascinates me, and you are so amazing.

So, yes, you may never find this but just think. 

I think of you.

I love you.
                                                                                                                                    KEIBYCRAFT