My Life - True Story

Depression..

Hey there it's been a long time...sorry for not updating! Any who today i'm gonna talk about depression...yeay!(sarcastic) This year have been very hard to me i guess 😅.

I'm not good at telling people about my fe..feel..feelings i'm usually quiet in my house cuz i know if i were gonna tell my family/sisters something they wouldn't really care...i might sound paranoid but sadly it's true. I would be like "Hey,wanna know something funny?" And my sisters would always be like "DO i look like i care?/And why would i care about that?".

Its THE STORY OF MY LIFE NOW...i'm an ambivert if you don't know that is its in between of being an introvert and an extrovert. If i were to be with just an aquaintance i tend to be quiet cuz i don't know what to say honestly i don't even know their interests but if i even did talked about that they would be talking or laughing really loud and that gets awkward real quick!

But if i were to be with my close friends and best friends i would be talking a lot(most likely) and laugh a lot with them. Usually when i'm with my friends, i can get into the conversations and make jokes a lot even if its not funny we all will laugh it off and just be happy about it...but its the opposite when your not with your members ya'know wut i'm sayin?...

Pretty much freaks me out even if i were to make eye contact with someone i barely know! There is always "awkward silence"...if you don't know i'm a k-pop er but i mostly stan Stray Kids cuz why not? Anyway please check out their song "Awkward Silence" i guarantee you, it will make you smile cuz its really cute and if you're not then you just have different taste in music...sorry to k-pop haters out there!

Anyway, depression is a feeling of being very sad either for a or no reason...it kinda depends on whats going on in your life! I rarely gets mad/angry at someone so i barely gets stessed out but becuz of that i'll always keep it to myself which destoys me just because i don't wanna hurt other people's feelings and change how they'll act around me...

Like i've said before i'm a quiet person if you have something funny/random to talk about just talk to me cuz thats the only way for me to talk to people by saying random stuffs on random moments. It gets really funny though if you have friends who does that too it will feel warm on the inside becuz they can compliment in the conversation that you're talkin about!

But in my case i get depression easily becuz there are people wondering/asking/wanting to know whats wrong with us but sometimes if you were to tell them they might not give the response you were hoping for or perhaps they won't understand and just misjudged you...well that happens to me a lot! I sometimes can be too open up about something and sometimes i'm just too colsed up about it...

Its a bad habit that i have everytime i'm socializing with people.
When i try to tell them about it its either they don't understand or would be like "just becuz of THAT your acting like this??". It makes me even more sad especially if its someone i look up to or my best friends...I just apparently will and always have a pathetic and sad life i guess!

Instead of looking down on them,comfort them cuz its already hard to tell someone something you've been keeping or even better if they look sad just don't ask these questions, "ARE YOU OKAY?","WHATS WRONG?","DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG?" cuz i know they'll lie about it and just smile to brush it off (kind of like me)

Just hug them and tell them "I know you aren't okay and it's okay to feel that way. I might not understand whats going on but i'll be waiting for you to tell me when you are ready to okay? Its okay to feel not okay!" I would be extremely happy if someone did that to me when i was sad well guess what they couldn't tell when i'm sad or not becuz they were looking at my happy smiles instead of my teary eyes..comment down below if you too can relate!

Guys,don't be like me okay? I know its hard to change that bad habit but i'm willing to try and i hope you do too! I hope this story gives a positive message to you. I myself are trying not to cry and don't worry and just be happy! Even if it is hard to be happy atleast try not to cry and wipe those tears away like wiping those haters away!!like what?!!! Anyway keep smiling and just be you!