"I'll come visit tomorrow. Sleep well, Yuki."
Eyes raw and hazy weighted by tiredness, a warmth weighed on her chest, her lungs buttery soft.
"Liam, stay."
How weak and meaningless her voice seemed now. Without the reins. Without direction, she was a ghost. But his voice was silver, a flame of white and frost. He left her body to follow, left that lifeless, coarse flesh to rot as it may. Something snagged.
A searing pain gripped her throat, ripped her from the light she so desperately craved and wrenched her back into the distortion of an eternal night.
Nowadays she felt as if something dragging her toward a darkness she could no longer deny was just the blank space behind her eyes. And so she would do as her boyfriend had told. Sleep and wait.
Quite often she would imagine scenarios of unusual circumstances, ones that were unlikely to happen. But only a figment of her mind. The things her beloved boyfriend did behind her back, what rumours spread about her, every little doubt a doctor has about her survival. Then suddenly her palms tensed into fists, knuckles growing whiter and face growing paler. Moment by moment, they started falling. Salty drops fall from her chin, drenching her hospital gown. It was raw. Everything. Raw tears, raw emotions.
She felt as if her lungs were on fire and heart was about to beat out of her chest.
Soft muffled cries escaped from her chapped lips, as she silenced them with her sleeve.
Her pulsing headache relaxed, slowly it all subsided. The scent of disinfectant and sweat clouded her senses.
Slowly her fingers hovered over the plug connected to the ventilator, gently beginning to pull. A flurry of emotion surged through her veins, leading to an end.
Seeing her loved ones making their way to the funeral venue. Bitter tears and entourages of ladies in black and men in tuxes. It was rather gloomy, but the sun outshone the sadness, with the first day of spring rolling around. The flowers erupting from the ground and frosted leaves finally thawing. Signs of new life awakening those that slept in hibernation. Along with everyone in black, leaving fresh pink roses on the casket. Watching as it lowered into the grave through tear-stained eyes.
"I'm sorry, love. I hope you don't think too badly of me" she thought to herself.
Slowly letting go of the plug, and sinking back down into the bed, tightly squeezing the therapy pillow. It's yellow glow reminding her of the sun, being a ray of hope, something she couldn't see from the closed blinds of her hospital ward. Another spark of happiness erupted within her as she heard a soft piano playing. Almost to the same sound, she hummed, forgetting what she was about to do. Feeling at peace once again.
So her eyes raw and hazy weighted by tiredness, laid to a rest. Soft snores and the rustle of sheets confirmed she was sleeping. So there she lay, peacefully, waiting till the next morning.
