If I died in November,
Would you remember
The way I look,
Or how my nose is always stuck in a book?
Would you care at all
That your phone would no longer pop up with a call
Or text from me?
Cant you see??
I'm ready to let go and cut my ties,
Leave behind everyone's lies.
Maybe then I would be content,
With life and how it went.
Everything around me is crashing down,
Causing the ones I love to frown.
I'm tired of depending on my girl,
For happiness; it's causing my thoughts to twirl.
Am I truly happy or is it a facade,
Will it eventually fade
Back into the depression I'm used to,
Because I dont know what to do anymore, it's true.
When there comes a day that I love life,
The next is always filled with thoughts of bloodied wrists and a knife.Maybe one day I will let go,
And into the wind I will flow.
Maybe one day I will wake up,
Without my emotions going corrupt,
Or my eyes filled with tears,
Because of my fears.
Maybe one day I will be able to say
That I am happy and not betray
You with my lie,
Because in truth I want to die.
Maybe, just maybe, one day I will give in,
And let the happiness wash away my sins.