In elementary and middle school, we were always so close, like sisters. Ever since we've entered high school, I feel like we haven't been hanging out as often as we used to. You've made new friends, and I have too, but that doesn't mean that we can't still spend time together, does it? I guess what I'm trying to get to is that we were best friends. We practically had a second home at each others' houses. I guess it would be normal for me to feel upset and jealous seeing you with your new friend group.
But for the past few weeks or so, I think what I've been feeling is more than wanting to be your best friend again. Now, I know that I'm not the only person in your life, and that I can't control whether or not you like me as much as you used to do. I'm not asking for you to come over to my house instead of one of your new friends, and sure, maybe I could give more of an effort to make plans with you, but it's hard to approach the girl you like, y'know?
I still remember how I got into liking horror stories. You might not, though, because I never told you. One time, at a sleepover, you showed me a bunch of horror movies you loved- like Donnie Darko, and The Conjuring. I did have real interest in them, but what I really fell in love with was how your eyes sparkled when you gushed about them to me, giving me a reason to watch and read more, so that we could share this passion, and so that I could see those sparkles again.
Though my feelings for you are unrequited, and always will be (after all, who actually falls in love and ends up in a relationship with their best friend since childhood?), I still find happiness in thinking of the day that you find someone that you can pour your heart into with every ounce of love you have. I won't lie. I want to be that person, I really do. But I won't be selfish. I hope that we can both find someone that we can love. But until then, I'm happy just watching you bloom from the sidelines.
I love you.
