crashing.

promise: chapter one.

Zayn.

I grabbed the bottle off of the rack and pulled the cap off, I didn't hesitant to chug the first few drinks. The burn quickly filled my throat, I ignored it until it finally calmed down. It wasn't working fast enough, I grabbed the next bottle and did the same as the first, I didn't even notice the burn on the first drinks, it's working.

I heard knocking on the door, scaring me enough to drop the bottle in my hands. I looked down at the mess I had made with the burning liquid I craved so much at the moment.

"Shit," I mumbled watching the alcohol seep through the carpet. I heard footsteps march through the hallway and into the kitchen, that's when I saw her, she looked so cute. Her eyebrows were mushed together and her nose was crinkled, she was upset. I wondered why, I looked down at her hands that were squeezed together into little fist and crossed across her chest. She looked so adorable but I knew she was mad, I looked at her lips and noticed they were moving really quick. She was talking about something, and she looked damn cute doing it.

I felt a stinging sensation shoot through my cheek, she had slapped me I should be mad yet here I was smiling down at how cute she looked doing it.

"Oh my god, Zayn. You're fucking pathetic! I told you not to drink, and what do you do? You fucking buy a whole liquor store and buy all the vodka they have! You think I haven't kept track of your credit-" she stopped yelling as soon as I looked up with tears in my eyes.

She sighed and threw her leather bag that she took everywhere on the floor, far away from my mess. She went to the closet next to the kitchen door and grabbed a broom and started sweeping up my mess. I watched her grab all the big pieces up with her hands, I winced when she put her hand next to a small almost invisible piece.

"Marie, I'm sorry." I bent down slowly and faced her, I hadn't had a very good view of her face until I was face-to-face with her. Her eyes were red and puffy, she had blotchy red spots all over her face, this was the effect of crying. But this time it was my fault, I had caused her to cry.

I reached out for her but she pulled back, shaking her head.

"Zayn," she croaked her voice full of sadness. "You promised to stop. You promised- I believed you." New tears were now falling down her face and hitting the carpet and broken pieces of glasses.

"I'm sorry, I tried Marie. I-I really did. I-I just- I had to." I put my face into my hands and shook my head trying to get rid of the headache I had tried to get rid of with the vodka. "I need you to help me Marie. I need you." I sobbed into my hands.

I heard her crying, "I tried to Zayn. I did everything I could Zayn. I stayed even after you and Perrie broke up. I stayed after One Directions break up. I stayed because- because I-I can't Zayn. You're slowly killing me. I can't-can't do this anymore."

I looked up and saw her in a small ball by the door, she was sobbing. Her small shoulders were shaking and her small hands were covering her beautiful brown eyes.

"Marie, don't-don't say that please. I-I can stop this, j-just don't say that." I was now sobbing uncontrollably, she was what kept me sane. I couldn't let her leave, "Marie. Please. Marry me Marie, please."

She shook her head and removed her hands, "Zayn. I tried-I tried." She continued to moan out saying she had tried and she was tired.

I felt my world crashing down, I crawled over to her and put my head on her knees. I hugged her small legs, "Don't leave me. Marry me Marie, marry me. Just please don't leave me." I was sobered up by now the alcohol still ran through my system but I knew what I was saying, I knew what I was doing.

"I can't Zayn, I can't." She cried, she pushed my head off her knees slowly and tried removing my hands from her legs but I just gripped tighter.

"Don't leave me Marie, don't." I cried, "I love you, please. I'll stop just don't leave me."

She gave up trying to push me away and grabbed my face smashing our lips together, I don't know why she did it but I'm happy she did. I tasted our tears between my lips as she tugged on my lower lip, she spread her legs and pulled me closer into her.

I tugged at her hair knowing that she loved it, I pushed my tounge into her mouth and hers moved with mine in sync. Times like these are when I knew we were meant to be, now I couldn't let her leave.

"Marie," I moaned as she started kissing my neck. I tugged on her hoodie strings, pulling her closer to me.

She slowly stopped kissing me and pulled our foreheads together looking down at her big brown eyes I smiled and kissed her nose.

"You promised me Zayn. Why? Why did you break it? You were doing so good, you were five months sober Zayn, you were doing great." She was still crying but not as heavy as before just a small stream but it was enough to make my heart break into small pieces. "Why would you just throw that all away Zayn?"

I pulled her into my chest and cradled her while she softly cried into my chest. I shook my head and I felt her tears seep through my shirt, I caused her to cry. It's my fault she wanted to leave me, it's my fault. All my fucking fault.

"I love you Marie, I love you so much. I didn't mean to hurt you baby, I just needed to escape my thoughts and I wasn't quite thinking straight." I nestled my head into her nest of gorgeous hair that was tied up into big bun, she had probably been watching her favorite tv show Friends before she had shown up at my house.

"Zayn, I can't marry you." She whispered softly into my chest. "You aren't ready to start a life and family if you're like this. You need professional help that I can't give you. Okay?" She pulled away and looked into my eyes, her eyes, face and neck they were all splotchy red yet she managed to look so damn beautiful. "Before I give you my answer you need to be fully functioning okay? To get over this bridge okay?"

I giggled, she loved that quote 'Cry all you want make a river out of your sadness but when you're ready build your damn bridge and get over it.' She had a smaller version tattooed on her left shoulder, she was covered in quotes and words, things that meant a lot to her, she couldn't just tattoo something on herself without it meaning something. I was so happy when she tattooed my name onto her rib cage for our birthdays last year.

"Okay, I'll get better for you. I promise-" she shook her head and put her small fingers on my lips.

"Don't make promises if you don't plan on keeping them Zayn." She whispered sadly and removed her fingers placing them on her lap.

I smiled softly, "I promise to get better for you." I repeated and kissed her button nose that was red from crying.

She looked into my eyes and stared at me, at times like these I felt like she was truly looking at me. That's what had captured me when I met her, she hadn't freaked out like the rest of the girls, she just stared at me and it creeped me out. When she finally stopped staring she told me I was beautiful and she left, I asked Harry for Marie's number and I called her and set up a date. We had become best friends after that, and she had stayed through everything.

"Thank you," she kissed my lips and got up walking over to the mess I had made earlier. She bent down and continued picking up the glass and throwing it into the bin next to her.

I watched her do it and slowly made my way over to help. I was in love with her and she was in love with me, I was going to get better for her. I was going to get better and then I was going to marry her. I had it all planned out, I just didn't expect it all to come crashing down like this. I didn't expect it at all.

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hi loves, just read this story if you like it vote for it, if you hate don't read it. just tell me what you think in the comments.

this is the only authors note in the whole story until the ending chapters.

enjoy the story, byee.

-belle, ♥️