I'll be sincere and honest, I like you, Austin. If I wasn't so nervous and shy around you, I would talk to you. My life has been crazy but I know one thing, I really do like you and it kills me to say it in silence. It was probably in sixth grade when I first started liking you, well kind of. At first, I went off on you for "supposedly" saying crap about my friends but that wasn't totally true. When I got paired to sit with you, things changed. I guess it was a few weeks after that when you first started opening up that I started liking you. People could say I'm crazy for liking you but when you smiled at me, it was different. It was so real like I never seen you smile with true happiness. Your whole face lit up and I fell. As we started talking, I got to know you on a more personal side and what amazed me was that nobody could tell. Every smile afterwards was lost. So suddenly....
I don't know what happened but you seemed so far and it hurt. I always used to like people by their looks but it changed when I truly met you. I remember those times a lot nowadays and I try to figure what happened but your not willing to explain or to share.
If I ever had a chance with you, I would cry. I try my hardest every day to see you smile, to see you truly happy with no success. Most would say I'm even in love with you and I might as well be. I want you to be happy even if it isn't me making you happy.
I miss your smiles, your laughs, you seem so lost now a days that it's hard to reach you.
Austin, I don't know what to say to you in all reality. I try many times to talk with you but you shut me down like you do to the rest.
I sometimes hate how much you got me thinking about you. You literally consume my mind. Make me think of ways to talk to you, interact with you and even see you. You might as well be toxic to me.
I want to tell you so many things but I can't. I see the way in class you look over at me like you want to say something but you don't. Even if it doesn't have anything to do with us in particular, I want you to know that I still like you. I would give up the world to be with you. I would do anything for you so yeah.... I guess I do love you, Austin.
