PETER KAVINSKY one shots + imagines

Passenger Seat - pt 2

Guys, we hit 1k views!
YYAAAAAYYY!!!

Every single one of you means so much to me! I love creating stories for you guys. I'm still willing to fill any requests if anyone has any great ideas, since I'm kinda running out. :)

So I figured I'd continue on with Passenger Seat, so here's part two!

Word count: 1880

Lara Jean's pov

Peter didn't say anything as we pulled out of the parking lot. I didn't speak on the way home either, but I kept my stupid smile plastered on anyways.

When we pulled up to my house, he didn't lean over to kiss my cheek like he normally did. I hopped out like I didn't notice.

Then he drove away. I watched the Jeep until it disappeared from sight, and then I stared at the empty road.

You see, I was not an idiot. I knew exactly what was going on.

I knew Peter would have admitted his feelings for me right in the middle of that lacrosse field today if I hadn't crushed his dreams under my feet.

I knew I had hurt him. I knew I was going to, and then I did it anyways.

So now I know what you're all wondering. What kind of stupid, selfish girl takes a boy like Peter Kavinsky and lets him fall for her, and then steps on his heart when he left it on the ground?

Well, me, apparently.
Trust me, I'm just as surprised as you are.

I turned away from the road and sulked up our walkway and through the front door.

"Hey! Lara Jean!"

I spun around, feeling my stomach grow heavier. Just as I thought, Josh was walking across our lawns to greet me.

While I had lied about a lot of things lately, I wasn't lying when I said Josh and I were friends again. We really had made up this morning.

"I'm glad you're still with Kavinsky. He makes you happy." Josh stuck his hands in his pockets. "I really mean it. I hope you know that."

"I do." I nodded. This was his way of apologizing for the comment he made earlier this morning on the drive to school.

Peter Kavinsky? I don't want to see you get hurt, Lara Jean.

That was when I realized that I didn't want to get hurt, either. This entire time, nothing has felt quite right. Everything feels like it's on the verge of falling apart, and it's tearing me apart.

I can't do it anymore. I can't let myself get hurt when Peter eventually falls back into Gen's arms, because I don't think he's strong enough not to. And I don't think that I'll be strong enough to handle being left again, which is really the thing that bothers me.

If I can be okay when I am with this boy, then I need to be okay without him, too.

I need to be in charge of my own happiness. I need to be able to take care of myself before I can let someone else do it.

Especially when this is all a fake(?) relationship.
So, yes. For once in my life, I agree with Josh. I'm not going to let myself get hurt.

But I don't tell him that. Yet.

"Thanks," I say to Josh.

"So he'll drive you tommorow?" Josh asks before heading back.

I honestly don't know. I suggested we end it at lunch, so I'm guessing that he'll still come in the morning.