Hungry

Chapter 23

Peter POV

After Tony calmed me down, he sat me on the floor in my room, leaving me sniffling. Wade walked in at that very moment and paused when he saw me.

"Baby Boy?"

"Wade!" I cried out, reaching up and making grabby hands at him. Wade obliged and swiftly scooped me up as I broke into the childish tears. "You shot yourself and I-I thought you were dead," I cried. Wade tsked softly.  In all honesty, I knew Wade would come back, I know he can't die, but the toddler side of me is just so clueless it doesn't understand that.

"Aw, that's too bad. Friday, play Gary Come Home all over the penthouse please." I immediately stopped crying. "Isn't the meme Despacito?" Wade snorted, "Since when do I play by the rules?" I nodded, scratching my chin as Gary Come Home began to play loudly.
"True true."

"Who the fuck turned this music on!?" Tony's voice could be heard downstairs. "LANGUAGE!" Steve yelled back from somewhere else in the penthouse. Wade frowned when he saw my pout. "What's wrong, Spidey?"

Wade sat down on the bed with me propped up on his knee. "That's the problem! I can't by Spidey. Not like...this!" I gestured to my small fat baby body. "It's baby fat," Wade corrected, poking my stomach lightly getting a small giggle out of me.

"How about this? I spar with you even though you are an adorable little cinnamon roll," Wade offered. I blushed. "W-Wade!"
"What?! All the fans will agree, ain't that right guys?" Wade asked, pointing to no one in particular.

I rolled my eyes, before snapping my chubby fingers. "That's actually not a bad idea!" I smiled. Wade smirked. "Oh, I'm full of them..."

Wade stood up and shuffled me onto his hip. "Now do you need a change? Do you need to go potty?" I went silent.
"I'll take that as a yes," Wade said slowly. I blushed a dark red.

"Wade!" I whined. Wade broke out into laughter.

--Timeskip--

Tony POV

I walked down the long halls with Pepper by my side. "Wade sure is something isn't he," Pepper said in a sarcastic tone, followed by a giggle.

"I mean, he was in Peter's phone contact and I know for a fact he was that interesting guy on the field trip," I claimed. "Oh the man who asked you which part you prefer of me? Breast of Ass?" Pepper asked casually.

I choked on my breath. "Pep!" I cursed out. Pepper laid her head on my shoulder, nuzzling close. "I can answer that myself. You like my ass more. It's the only thing I really advertise for you." My eyes bulged. "I don't even know who you are anymore!" Pepper pushed me playfully. "I'm kidding, Tones," Pepper leaned on me, kissing my cheek and nibbling on my ear. "Probably..."

I shoved Pep away with a laugh. "Where are my boys anyway," I asked. "Um, Wade's body isn't in the kitchen anymore, and Peter isn't in his room," Pepper informed me. "Jarvis would have alerted me if they left," I added. 

"Where are they, Friday?"
"The sparring room," Friday chirped. I paused for a moment, a confused smile finding it's way to my face. "Um...what?" I asked. "Please repeat, " Pepper said sweetly.

"Wade and Peter are sparring in the sparring--" We didn't even allow Fri to finish her sentence as we raced into the elevator. "Spar floor. Now."

We came upon a horrifying sight as Peter bounced onto the ceiling as Wade tried to shoot at him. "Good dodge, Petey Pie!" Wade whipped out his katanas and lunged out at him. Peter crawled away. "Hehe, thanks Deadpool!"

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Pepper screeched. The room fell silent. I swear you could hear a fly fart.

"Um," Peter hummed, biting his lip and dropping from the ceiling. Wade swiftly dropped his katanas and kicking them to the side. "Ma, it's not what it looks like?"

I allowed Pepper to do the talking if anything she was more threatening than me.

"Oh really?" Pepper crossed her arms over her chest, her eyebrows raised in disbelief. "Because it looks like a toddler is sparring with a fucking mercenary!"

There was a moment of silence for a few seconds, the lights on the ceiling letting out a hum. Wade and Peter pointed at each other. "He did it!"

Wade brought his hands up to his face in a shocked betrayed look. "Peter I can't believe you'd just throw me under the bus like that!"

"Throw you under the bus, bitch! Are you fucking high?!"
I grabbed my hair and pulled it as a way to deal with my stress. "FUCKING. LANGUAGE!" I cursed. Wade pointed at me. "That phrase lost all meaning now."

Pepper scooped Peter up.
"You shouldn't be sparring. Injured or not. Your a baby for crying out loud," Pepper scolded.

"I know Miss Potts," Peter sniffled. "Don't Miss Potts her, young man," I scolded. "Oh, sorry. Yes Ma'am," Peter corrected himself.

Pepper sighed softly. "I'll put him to bed," Pepper said, escorting herself, and Peter, out of the room. I looked over at Wade with a death glare and Wade nervously smiled with an awkward chuckle.

"Heh..."
"Ahem," I coughed. Wade whistled lowly before rocking back and forth on his feet. He looked down at the floor. "Someone's going to comment on this paragraph. I just know it," Wade murmured.
"What?"

What's up with Peter and Wade with these pop cultural references? That's...what they are, right?

"I'll just," Wade pointed behind himself towards the windows. "Let myself out." Wade spun around on his heels and whipped out his guns, heading at full sprint towards the windows, shooting at it until it cracked. 
"AJ-AJ-AJ-AJ-AJ!" Wade chanted loudly at the top of his lungs as he burst out of the window. I could hear his voice getting slightly quieter before I couldn't hear it anymore. I stepped further, peering out of the window and saw the red and black spot on the sidewalk down below.

"He's fine," I assured myself, stepping back from the broken window. "Uh, Jarvis will you, uh--" "Already ordering a new window," Jarvis interrupted.

"That's Jar," I exhaled in relief, taking the elevator back to the main penthouse floor. "Uh, Jarvis?" "Yes, Boss?"
"How many windows are broken here in a month," I asked curiously. "At least 73 a month," Jarvis stated. "Damn," I mumbled.

"LANGUAGE!" I heard Steve yell.

"It's getting fucking old grandpa!" I yelled back in annoyance. As I walked down the hallway to my bedroom, I saw Pepper leaving Peter's room. "He's done," Pepper sighed softly. I smirked. "He's finally down."

"Was he that difficult to put to bed," I asked in amusement. "He's a small ball of energy. He's slippery," Pepper excused. I grunted in return, before opening my door to my room, Pepper following close behind.

"So, since when do you say language?" Pepper asked with a teasing smile, biting her lip.

"That old fart is rubbing off on me," I grumbled. "Watch yo profanity," Pepper scolded, swatting me lightly. As I laid down on my face, Pepper laid down beside me.

"Do you ever sleep?" Pepper asked in confusion.
"I can't work in the lab now, not when Peter can bounce out his crib at any moment," I explained. "Nah, you just want a piece of this," Pepper corrected. "Pep!" I whined out, throwing a pillow at her face. She simply giggled lightly before laying down beside me and spooning me.

It was quiet for a little while.

"Wade's coming over tomorrow isn't he?" Pepper asked in a dry tone.
"Yes," I answered simply.
"He's going to babysit Peter while we go to the meeting, isn't he?"
"Yup," I answered tiredly.

"Bring it on," Pepper said dryly with confidence.