TONI POV: 3 years old
"Rose, do you want to go home?" I ask, she nods. "Ok, we need to be here for 10 more minuets. Do you want me to stay with you?" She nods. "Ok I need to tell Cheryl something and I'll be back in 2 minuets." I get up and walk over to Cheryl, keeping a eye on Rose. "We should get going. Rose has completely shut down." Cheryl looks at me. "Yeah just give me a minute to find the twins, their probably interrogating Jughead." She walks away as I go back over to Rose. "Did you have fun?" I ask. She stands up and starts walking but I stop her. "Stop, 5 more minuets. Cheryl needs to find the twins." She nods. Cheryl walks over to us. "We can go now." Rose immediately walks out and I run after her. "Hey stop." I stop her. "Home." We walk to the car.
"Stop yelling." I try to stop Rose. "No!" She jumps up. "Stop. Calm down." I pull her into a hug and rub her back. "Calm down." We sit down on the ground. Cheryl walks into the room. "Do you want to switch." She whispers. I shake my head. "Dinner will be there when your done." I nod. Rose tries to hit me, I quickly stop her. "Stop!" I yell. Cheryl quietly walks out and closes the door. "You don't hit." She tried again. "Calm down." She puts her head in my lap. "Calm down." She repeats. I stroke her hair. "It's ok." She finally calms down and sits up again. "Do you want to talk?" She nods. "Today was a little overwhelming, right?" She nods. "Yeah." I rub her shoulder. "Why do you think that was ok to have a meltdown?" I ask. "No." She looks away. "No, why do you think it was ok, not was it ok." She stands up. "Sit down." She sits down again. "Was it ok?" She shakes her head. "Do you want to go down stairs?" She nods. "Ok, I get it that somethings can be overwhelming but it ok to breath or talk to me or Cheryl we can step outside with you. Lets go down and eat." We stand up, go down stairs and eat.
"Cheryl, she'll be ok." I calm her down. "Toni, I'm worried about her. She had another meltdown today." I pull her closer to me. "We have her in therapy, and when she did it wasn't as bad. She calmed down faster than before. And this is the first time in about 9 months that this has happened." We usually talk before we go to sleep about what had happened throughout the day. It's usually about Rose. "Your right." She lies her hands on my shoulders gently and looks away. "Hey." She looks at me. "I love you." I pull her into a kiss. "And everything will be ok." I kiss her again. "Ok." She whispers. "I'll go check on the kids." I get up as she lies down. I knock in JJ's door. "JJ, you awake?" I whisper. I look over and he is sound asleep. I turn off the light and close the door. I walk across to Roses room, who has been asleep for a few hours she's the oldest but goes to bed the earliest. Especially after her meltdowns. I don't close the door because she might panic in the morning and go straight to Mary's room. She's still awake. "Hey, its time for bed." She looks at me. "Ok." She lies down. I sit on her bed. "You ok?" I ask. "Yeah just tired." I rub her hair. "Ok."
4 years old
"Mom. Please." I turn around. "Your not ready." She looks down but quickly looks back up. "I want to prove myself." I start to walk away. She follows me. "I want to prove to you, and all the serpents that I can do it." I stop and turn around. "Do you really think you can do it?" I ask. She nods. "Yes." I step closer. She has changed this past year, she has started to show her loyalty, she has stuck up for the serpents in the pass. "Fine, come to the next meeting, learn all the laws and we'll see from there." I walk away. Cheryl looks at me. "She's not becoming a serpent." Oh right, Cheryl is against the thought of her becoming a serpent. "Cheryl." I think for a second. "I got nothing." I say in defeat. She stands up, and walks over. "Toni, she's to young." I kiss her so she shuts up. "I was younger when I joined, you were her age when you join." I remind her. "Your right. I just don't want something to happen to her." She rubs my cheek. And she's right. "I'll protect her, I have been forever. I love these kids, even if their response is peeing in my face." She kisses my cheek. "JJ does the same to me, he need to learn how to correctly use the bathroom I'm tired of changing his diaper he's 3. Pull ups at least." She walks away
"You can stop now if you want, you don't have to do this to prove anything." I desperately try to talk her out of this. "I'm doing this and your not stopping me." She stares at me. "Ok. Have fun getting your ass handed to you." I walk away and let her run the gauntlet. "Toni." I look back at Cheryl. "This is the biggest mistake, you will ever make." I turn around to see Rose asking for her Jacket. I hand her, her Jacket. "Thank you." She puts her jacket on. "You ready for a tattoo?" I ask. "Yeah let's do it." She walks to the car. I look over at Cheryl who looks pissed. "Toni, this is a mistake." She walks to the car. I look at Fangs, he shakes his head. "She never wanted you to be in charge." He says awkwardly. "I know but, I didn't have a choice." I walk away to the car and get in.
8th grade
I look over at JJ, I've never seen him in this much pain. Your never supposed to bury your child, and if you do not at a young age. "Toni, are you drunk?" Cheryl whispers in my ear. "No." Yes, how the hell did she notice? "Toni, this is not the time." I close my eyes. "Toni your going to have to talk to people. I get that the past week has been hard but, your never going to get through this if you don't remember it in the next morning." I look over at her. "Cheryl I'll be fine by the time that happens." She shakes her head. "I need to see a therapist. I will admit that, but I can't get through this." She takes my hand. "If you not in therapy by next week, your sleeping on the couch. Until you do." I nod. "Yeah." She hands me a bottle of water. "Mom." Mary pulls Cheryl aside. I look at JJ. "This is the first time I've seen Mary this whole time." I tell him. "Mom, She doesn't want to go home. Trust me." I turn to him. "Why?" I ask. "She-." Cheryl and Mary walk back over. "Hey."
"Cheryl, calm down." I hold her shoulders. "I can't, I can't do this. I want to find the guy who shot Rose." She starts panicking. I stands up. "Cheryl there's nothing we can do." We both start crying. I pull her into a hug. "Moms." Cheryl turns around and wipes her tears, something she's done her whole life. "I just came to say goodnight." Jason quickly walks out. "He's going to be an awkward teenager." She laughs. "He already is."
