This is how it works: I write something horrible (about the subject, in this case, it's a 1D fanfic) and then I write what's wrong with it in square brackets liiiike [ ] in boldeh ;) (for those of you using a phone -you rich people; I have a phone, don't worry- just reaally watch out for the [ ]. Capish?
(This is dedicated to @I_am_a_directioner and a shout out to her friend, Emily ;) Not saying their fanfic is bad...)
Okay, so here's my theory: one more 1D fanfic and Wattpad will explode into a million pixels.
I'm Directioner so it's fine, but it get reaaaaaally boring sometimes.
So here it is, How Not To: 1D Fanfics.
hi, my names mona an im seventeen my mom jus told me to pack so i went to my room so i can pack all of my cloths.
[[[[[[No, no, no, no. First: The 'hi' is uncapitalised. NOOOOO NOOOO but NOOOOO. You always put a capitalised letter at the start of a sentence, especially since it's the start of a chapter.
Two: YOU DON'T JUST SAY THE NAME AND AGE LIKE THAT GAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Find some way to interpret it in, like... "Hey Mona," My mom called.
Three: 'my mom jus told me to pack so i went to my room so i can pack all of my cloths.' I MEAN WHAT?! have a start maaaan. don't just be like, 'mom said pack' NO, make an intro, theeen you can put the event in later.
Four: WHERE THE HELL IS THE PUNCTUATION AND SPELLING? IT SHOULD BE 'Hi, my name's Mona and I'm seventeen. My mom just told me to pack, so I went to my room so I can pack all of my clothes.' if you'd want to keep the sentence like that.
Five: GRAMMAR MAN, DID IT JUST RUN AWAY FROM THE PAGE WHEN YOU WEREN'T LOOKING?! 'Hi, my name's Mona and I'm seventeen. My mom just told me to pack and I went to my room so I could pack all of my clothes.']]]]]]
'wher ar we goin' i asked
[[[[NO NO NO. One: You use speech marks, that's what they're there for. " " Which brings me to the fourth point, laaaater. Read the 2nd and 3rd one first.
Two: AGAIN WITH THE CAPITALISATION 'W'here' and 'I' People always miss the 'I'
Three: Spelling, "Where are we we going" I asked
Four: PUNCTUATE PUNCTUATE THIS GAH. "Where are we going?" I asked.]]]]]
'were goin to england' she yelled up at me.
[[[[[[[[[[THIS IS THE SAME AS THE ABOVE ONE. speech marks, Capitalisation, spelling et cetera
And include on how she/he says it.]]]]]]]]]]
i smiled an tossed my ipod into a carrier bag wit some books an my phone an all of the stuff i need. i then put all of my tees in the luggage an then my shoes an then my jeans an short an then i took a shower an curled my hair cuz i dont like my hair straigh an then i put on som blusher an then i put on my fav lipstik an then i put som eyeliner but n ot too much cuz i dont like to be like those cherleders.
[[[[[If you can't see what's wrong with this, then... I don't know.
Capitalisation, sentences, punctuation. One more very important thing, Don't just straight out say what the characters doing, include how she/he does it etc.]]]]]
we then wnt to th arport an got on the plan to englnd.
then aftr tht, we went to the hotel an i went to the beach after that. i met a girl, her names lisa (LOL, Mona Lisa) an we became best frens. we sat under a unbrela she had an a ball hit me on the head.
'ow.' i said an a guy ran up to us.
'sorry, harry did tht, whts ur name im louis tomlinson from one direction' he smild 'CARROTS'
me an my friend scremd, we wer big fan of one direction (Hah, everyone spells One Direction right).
harry came over an sed 'can we hav ur number?'
i smild an sed yes an lisa also sed yes. we gave them a hug an saw the rest of one direction.
'CARROTS' louis said an nial sed 'NANDOS' an we went to nandos an then we went to ther hotel which was the same as lisas an me.
'im tired' i sed\
'VAS HAPPENIN' zain sed 'no its movie nite'
'ok' i sed an we watch a movie.
[[[[[[[[NO JUST NO. GAH THIS IS ALL SO WRONG. Look at the advice above. Punctuate, capitalise and spell. I'm too tired to correct it xD
Okay, seriously? Nandos and a movie? How cliche can you get? UH.
Uhhh...Really? The boys do not always say Carrots, nandos or vas happenin or turtles or Toy Story or curls or mirrors or UNICORNS (ok, I was kidding about the last thing but maybe it does happen, y'never know. I figure me and Louis should have a very serious coversation about unicorns and *cough* robots that are going to take over the entire world *cough*)
I'M SORRY DIRECTIONATORS BUT... Louis does not say carrots every two seconds; that goes for Niall and Nandos and Zayn and 'Vas' Happenin' (What really gets on my nerves is when people spell it like 'Vas Hapenen' GAH THAT IS SO WRONG)
SPELLING, SPELLING IS IMPORTANT. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SPELL GO TO THE EDITOR'S CLUB AND FIND SOMEONE TO DO THE TECHNICAL STUFF FOR YOU]]]]]]]]]]
Now, I think this is enough for one...
Click on the button that says: 'How Not To: 1D Fanfics - Part 2'
