You Would Do Anything? Phan

You left with a note.

"You are dead Howell. So dead!" I heard one of the bullies scream at my Dan

I watched from a distance I couldn't move closer. I was stuck unable to move it was like I was glued to the floor.

"I know. I already am." He wheezed between small breaths and crying. His wrists were slit and his chocolate eyes stared into mine. No longer lively but dead. He got up everyone stared in shock. Dan walked up to me looked me in the eyes and said "on the day there will be a note. A meaningful note you will only know then how I go." With that he walked past me and jumped out the window. Everyone ran down the stairs. And there lay a simple note that said:

'Im sorry Phil...'

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"DAN!" I woke up screaming. It was a dream, I heard loud footsteps running down the hall way.

"Phil!" I heard Dan's voice scream. He ran in the room and turned on the lights. He'd been crying as well, his eyes were red and sore like mine. He ran over and sat next to me cuddling me hard "shhh everything's ok everything's ok" Dan repeated over and over. I just cried hard and painfully.

"Say literally for me?" I asked wanting to hear that one word.

"Literally" he whispered into my ear. We sat there in bed for a while before Dan said "I don't want to leave you here. Can I stay I know we had the argument but-"

"Yes." I replied cutting off his question. He climbed under the sheet he cuddled me tight knowing neither if us wanted to let go.

"What was your dream about?" Dan asked me softly and calmly knowing it was a tough question.

"You know your bullies?" I asked. It took a while before I realised he was crying I looked up at him our eyes meeting. This wasn't about my dream anymore this was about real life. Dan was suicidle depressed to the point he hardly spoke to anyone except me. That's why I never had to ask why he was crying I knew. He was always punched and kicked by bullied told things no one could take back. I hugged Dan tight I couldn't ever let this go.

"Yeah, carry on"he sniffed and cried.

"They made you cut your wrists a lot deeper than usual." I said. Dan cut himself at first I tried to help, then I realised he never went that deep and it had become a habit I just let him get on with it, I sat with him whilst he did it and hugged him as his sobbs racked through my body.

"Phil I would never leave you like that." He said honestly and purely. I sighed into his chest and gripped his hand. I dragged him out of bed and we walked over to the bathroom. I grabbed the blade and handed it to Dan.

"You had a choice you chose this. I don't know why! But I have learnt that I have to deal with this procedure it's a way of letting your pain out. But." I started I knew the next words would come out and hit Dan in the face but soak in. I dragged him over to the window and that's when the words came out. "Take it. Throw it far" I said. Dan looked at my eyes and searched them in fear and pain. This wasn't easy.

"Why now?" Dan cried. His eyes spilled with water.

"Because it's my only way of letting myself know you'll never cut too deep." I said calm and levelled. "Look we'll do it together on three" I grabbed his arm and kissed his cheek. He looked ready to let go. Let go of the pain. "One...two...three" we threw it far away it vanished into the dark night sky.

"That feels better." He said. I smiled and then I cried because I knew there wasn't much more time left before Dan was driven over the edge. Dan was a lost boy.
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The next day Dan returned from college crying harder than ever before. Loud wails echoed the house. It was time. He was driven over the edge. This was the point of life and death. Dan either lives or dies. I'm part of that decision. I heard our bedroom door slam from the living room. I walked down the hall way. Cautiously I opened the door. Dan looked up at me I was shocked at what I saw. Across his forehead someone had written: Gay!

He was broken in two. This was it he was broken this was the end. Dan was driven beyond the edge. I sat down next to him. I lay my head in the crook of his neck and thought about my next words. I was about to say something when Dan grabbed my hand and we walked to the bathroom.

"I bought new blades" Dan said broken in so many ways.

"I knew you would Dan I'm not disappointed." I said rubbing my hand up and down his arm. I let him get on with it. This time I did something I'd never done before, I watched each and every slice of his wrist happen as he cried. Suddenly he stopped and threw the blade down. He ran out of my arms and stood at the window.

He opened the window. I stood and watched. Then just said "there's nothing I can do this time is there?" I asked in a painful voice.

"There's one thing." He said. "You can say you love me" he cried.

"I love you. I love you more than anything in the world. You are my reason Dan. You are my reason to exist." With that I grabbed Dans broken body and kissed him passionately.

"There's a note." He said quietly. "Fall back take a few steps and Launch forward. I love you too Phil" he said. "I always will" hope drained from my body as he repeated the words and actions he said before. He was gone. Daniel Howell was a beautiful guy who never got to live his life to the full and Tuesday 5th August 2014 17:43 was when he jumped.

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"Phil Lester!" Dan shouted "I'm gonna find you" we were playing blind mans buff. I saw his arms come towards me. He found me and hugged me picked me up off the ground and spun me around. My nose filled with his scent. I took it in.
He had to go. He couldn't stay for long. "Don't leave forever right?" I asked him. "Never" Dan said.

Dan Howell is dead. He comes back every so often but not often enough. It was my turn to leave I could be with him forever now so:

I held on to him so I could finally let him go. I jumped.

The note Dan wrote:

Phil, I love you and you know that too well. I think we both knew this would happen. We both knew I would have to leave. Don't worry I'm not leaving forever. One day maybe you'll join me! Ha I don't mean killing yourself. Too many people will suffer without you. Which was the hardest decision about this. But you would do anything for me! I did this for you. You don't need some depressed kid messing your life up. But going back to you will do anything, I need you Phil.

Love Dan xxxxxxxx

So I jumped Dan needed me and I needed him. I joined him and we are both so happy.

[A/N] that was probably rubbish but I still hoped you enjoyed this. I love Dan and Phil this is if there lives were messed up but there love pulls them through and they were happy finally. I am bringing out a full Phan fan fic soon it's not as depressing as this it's a full story. One question. Did You Cry? Or was it sad. I wanted to know my skills for sad stories. Comment if you cried!
Vote if it's worthy!