It just continues

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It was if a feeling of truth hit her. The emotions she felt, overwhelmed her soul; and she could not bare it anymore.

Although she did everything in her power to make it stop, she made it worse. She had suffered enough by the world's hands, yet something that she avoided all her life caused her to regret everything. She felt the way it felt to love; as much as she liked the feeling she had never felt before. There was something that troubled her so; he was something she could not understand. She never felt so lost before, she didn't know of what to do. The feels, the emotions, everything had come upon her and crush her like an aluminium can.

She wanted her thoughts to be silent for once, but the persistence of those thoughts costed her much sleep. She only thought of him and her wondering thoughts painted a canvas of good times and bad.

Mostly the bad. A delusion she had been dragged into by her own. She felt lost of what to say or do when he is around. He made her feel different, one side, a longing need to be with him and the other just repulsion.

What even is this?

She doesn't even know it herself. She never had to deal with anything like this before; because she avoided it for so long knowing how much pain it would cost. Now she regrets falling too easily, she is stupid, and blames herself to let it consume her very being.

There's nothing she does, she waits and waits, though no action on either side becomes a reality.

Absurd, yes. But why act as if it's okay? She holds herself in her suffering, waiting till it's the time she knows it will end badly.

It's only the beginning

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⏰ Last updated: Oct 02, 2018 ⏰

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