The Narrow Gauge saga

Steamroller

Sir Handel is proud of his durable rear wheels. They have broad tires that hold well to the rails. But their are kind of odd. One day, the other engines wouldn't stop teasing him. "Look at his steamroller wheels," they joked. "Shuddup!" "Hey," said Peter Sam, "you used to tease me about my special funnel until you learned how useful it is. "AHA! You're jealous!" snuffed Sir Handel, "my wheels are special, like Peter Sam's funnel. I can go faster than any of you!" "Y'know," said Skarloey, "with your special wheels, Sir H, you're just the engine to take on George." "Who is this Gay-org you speak of?" "That steamroller over there." George had come to widen the road that ran for a mile or five dozen by the railway. Almost every engine on Sodor knew the cruelty George was capable of. He was even making rude remarks about the engines.  "Railways are no good. Turn'm into roads. Pull'm up. Turn them into roads. Railways are no good. Turn'm into roads. Pull'm up. Turn them into roads." "Don't worry about him," said Sir Handel. "Leave him to me. I'm gunna send him packing, then he'll get a run for his money." At 11:22 AM, George was at the level crossing. "Huh!" "You're Sir Handel, I suppose." "And you, I supposes, are George. I know all about you." "And I hearda you. You swank around with your pretty wheels pretending your as good as me." "Actually, I'm better than you. B'bye shnookums. ;-)" George chuffered on, fuming. At 2:30 PM, Sir Handel brought a special load down after the last train had gone. When he reached the road, he saw George trundling home. Sir Handel tried to get his attention. "Peepity pip pip peep!" "You again?" George exclaimed. "Me again," said Sir Handel, "Y'gotta problem with that?" There was barely room to pass, and George and Sir Handel were trying to overtake each other to show they were better than each other. "Get outta my way you great clutzy road hog." "Huh! I don't move for imitation steamrollers! You don't own the road. Get outta my way!" They lumbered along as the insults continued. Their divers signaled for each other to stop, but then there was a crash. The cars tilted sideways. "YOW!" cried Sir Handel, "That was your fault!" "No it wasn't. It was yours." Everyone was hotly arguing over who was to blame. A policeman arrived just in time to stop the argument from turning into a fistfight, and when Sir Handel's fireman came back with Rusty and Mr. Percival, they set to work cleaning the mess nobody had been going fast enough to cause much damage, so Sir Handel was able to bring his train when George backed away. Next day, the workmen put up a fence between the road and the railway. Then they went away, taking George with them. Sir Handel thought he had made George go away. He talked about nothing but steamrollers. "Oh dear," said Skarloey, "he's worse than ever. I'm sorry my plan was no good." "Never mind," said Rusty, "we'll think of something else." But they had need for that. Some boys arrived and asked Mr. Percival if they could see the engines. They said "L00k! Here's Sir Handel. He tried to race a steamroller, but the steamroller nearly beat him!" Sir Handel never mentions steamrollers, now.