I'm Not Sure Yet

Turbulence

Kaden Fucking Jones. I couldn't believe it. There was no way, no way in hell this man wiggled his way back into my life. We have history if you haven't noticed by my reaction already. He used to be my best friend back since I was 7 until we turned 12.  He knew everything about me, E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. My background where I came from, my past. He knew it all.

One thing you should know about Kaden is, he is violent, not like passive aggressive violent but more like he'll hurt you so bad that you won't want to mess with him ever again type of violent. Point is he scares the hell out of me. That's the reason we stopped being friends, I witnessed Kaden at his worst.

It was my 12th birthday, I was putting up all my gifts that I got , I was pretty worn out and ready to go to sleep but Kaden was still at my house and his mom was still talking to my mom in the living room so we were just chilling in my backyard.  Kaden was talking about some show, when he suddenly got up ran into the bushes and came back with a baby bird. I was amazed at first , it was adorable until I saw how Kaden was looking at it. He had a hungry almost crazed look in his eyes. In one swift movement he snapped the birds' neck. I screamed. He told me to shut up and next thing I knew our moms were outside, I was sent to sleep and never again did I see Kaden.

He tried contacting me weeks afterwards, but my mom wouldn't allow it she said he had things to work out and we just needed to give him some space.  Now that he's back I wonder if he remembers me, I must admit i do look different than I did when I was twelve but you never know. He looked the same with his jet black hair and bright hazel eyes. He had the same expression on his face as well a look that lured you in but also intimidated you at the same time.  The teacher introduced him to the class and said " This is Kaden Jones, he is a new student and will be joining us for the rest of the semester,please be kind and give him a warm welcome."  He sat down. Next. To.Me.

I tried so hard to pay attention and not look his way at all, but it was difficult when all he did was stare at me. When the bell rang I ran out out of class so fast, I was shook for the rest of the week. I dreaded going to second block but I just got over it and went.

The week flew by and until Friday is when things got scary. Kaden was sitting down when I walked into class he looked so pissed, I had managed to avoid speaking to him this whole week. I sat down and immediately he looked at me and said " You have a boyfriend now?"
"What?" I said.
"Answer me Do you have a fucking boyfriend?"
"Um sort of yeah."i responded.
"What the fuck , Grace what happened to I don't ever want to date anyone because of what your dad did to you?" Kaden whispered angrily.
"Dude what the fuck? Shut up! that was a while ago and its none of your business." I said.
I got up and went out into the corridor, nobody is ever there and its my place to cool down if i'm mad. I sat down and took a deep breath next thing I know Kaden is in here too yelling at me. I tried to leave but he wouldn't let me
"Listen to me Grace I'm I'm so angry at you, why would you betray me?, why would you forget about me?"
"Get off off me!" I yelled at him.
Next thing I know he's hitting me over and over. I close my eyes and cover my face and wait. When he's done he says " If you tell anyone! ANYONE, I'll kill your precious boyfriend and you know I will do it"
I just laid there and cried. I got up go to the restroom and look at myself.
My face was okay but my lower stomach had a bruise so did my lower thighs. I sat on the floor and cried.
The following week not a word was said  between me and Kaden. On Friday while I was at work , I was about to close up the kitchen and leave when our bartender Brent caught me before I left he said "Hey I need your opinion on some drinks I wanna add to the menu, could you stay for a bit?"
Yeah i know I shouldn't be drinking but whatever I was already upset. So I stayed.
I drank. A lot I don't remember what he put in the drinks but next thing I know I'm sitting and I don't know how imma get home so I text Robert.
* Heyyyyaaaa* Me
* Hey you off work yet* Robert
*Nope still here Chilllinnggg at the bar* Me

* Are you drinking?*Robert

* Oo this is a good song, listen!* Me

* 😂um you're drunk*Robert

* Nahhhh bro I'm fineee I lost my
friend tho..where she go? I feel sick* Me
* Do you need me to pick you up? * Robert

*Yes Sirrrr* Me

I drink some more and wait Robert eventually gets there and I jump on him to give him a hug.
" Woah Grace calm down, How much did you drink?"
" Ah, you know like three."  i respond giggling.
"Alright lets get you home." Robert says.
He sets me down gently in his car as if i'm so fragile I could break. He takes my breath away.
He gets in and we are riding. SuddenlyI yell at him and tell him to pull over. I get out and start taking deep breaths I felt sick. He gets out the car and follows me we were in an abandoned parking lot.  I sit on the ground and he sits next to me. I lay my head on his shoulder and he says "Hey lets get back in the car and you can rest for a little bit."
The alcohol was wearing off and my mouth was dry.
I said " Okay ." but instead of letting me walk he scoops me off my feet and carries me into the backseat of the car, He sits down and tells me to put my head on his lap and I did, we just laid there for a good while. I woke up and just looked at him, he was asleep, he looked so peaceful. I got up and kissed his cheek ever so gently. His eyes fluttered opened and he looked at me and smiled. "Hi" I say.
He kisses me and I kiss him back, I sit myself on top of him and continue to kiss him, inhaling his sweet aroma, In one swift movement I take my shirt off and i'm grinding on top of him. He suddenly looks at me and says "Are you sure?" I smiled "Yes"
We kiss until we are out of breath but I didn't want to stop. His shirt comes off next and I'm leaving a trail of kisses all over his torso. He starts touching me everywhere and it sends electric shocks throughout my body. He lays down and i'm on top of him. He unclasps my bra and is caressing my breast so tenderly next thing I know he's kissing them and I'm moaning in pleasure. He starts to unbutton my pants I was so into it that I completely forgot about my bruises they were fading but very much there. He was kissing me and then look down at my thighs and stopped.
"Grace, what happened?" He asks.
I stayed quiet I didn't know what to say.
"Grace ?" He looks at me with a pleading look in his eyes.

Just when i'm about to tell him I remember what Kaden said to me and I just closed my mouth.

"Okay, lets just get you home." Robert says

" Robert no its not what you think, well I don't know what you're thinking."

"Just tell me what happened." He said 

" I can't" I say.

He gets out of the car gets to the drivers seat turns it on and starts driving. I start putting my clothes on and I sit in silence the rest of the way.
When he stops at my house I say
" I want to tell you but I can't, please trust me, I'm doing it for you."

"Grace, You're hurt and you don't understand how much it hurts me that you didn't tell me, How am I supposed to protect you when you don't tell me."

"I'm sorry. I can't" I say barely above a whisper.

"Okay, I'll see you later take care." He says coldy.
I get out the car and walk inside. Go to my room. I start crying. Stupid Stupid Kaden I hate him I hate him. Everything was okay it was okay.......