Broken Strings- Chim

EIGHT.

She didn't come home.

It's been two days after she was scheduled to come home and she hasn't walked in yet.

Everytime i hear a noise i expect her to walk in, shouting my name in anger as she steps on one of my heels or telling the dogs off from jumping all over her the minute she walks in the door.

The girls have stayed over and they keep putting me off opening the last letter but i finally exploded, screaming at them that it's my decision and crying before i've even opened it but i can't help it.

I've never felt so... empty.

'Dearest Cheryl,

I suppose this letter will be opened and read multiple times since i'll never be able to come back but i hope you never get sick of reading it.

If you're reading this right now, i know that you're crying, so stop. You always cried when i was in the hospital, even when i was simply resting my eyes. You always feared my death and it broke my heart every time to see you so worried and sad because of me. So stop crying honey, for me.

Now I know how hard it is to get used to the fact that someone you held very close to your heart is gone forever. Really, I do. I'm not just saying (or writing) that to make you feel better.

When i found out about the news, i never thought i'd be able to love or even be happy again. It took me a while to wrap my head completely around what was happening, and I'm sure that you know this. I didn't feel like i was there enough for you, i was always the strong one but you taught me that it's ok to cry, it's ok not to be strong all the time. But one day, i was sick or crying and grieving and wasting my life away even more.

I made a promise that day that I had to stop being sorry for myself and it was time to move on and live what i had left.

And you know what helped me with that?

You.

What kind of girlfriend would i be to you if i was always crying over something i couldn't help?

What kind of girlfriend would i be to you if i never spent any time, making memories with you?

What kind of girlfriend would i be to you if i couldn't show the one girl i love the most, how much i really loved her?

If i had just moped around for the rest of my life, we probably wouldn't have turned out like we did. I would have missed every important milestone in our relationship like our anniversaries, buying our first house, getting out first pets.

That's why I made a change.

You see, the best way to get out of a situation like this is to find something to keep fighting for.

That's exactly what i did for you.

No matter what the hell the world is like, you keep finding something to fight for under any circumstance.

And sometimes it helps to think like this: if the person you've lost really cared about you, they wouldn't want you to be hung up on them your whole life. They would want you to live and be happy.

Like I want for you.

And it's not like i'm gone entirely.

I may be gone physically but I am there with you spiritually.

Where you might ask?

Put your hand against the middle of your chest.

Do you feel that thing beating beneath your skin?

I'm in there.

So keep fighting Cheryl. I know you are strong enough.

Don't let me down baby.

Remember that there's nothing you can't do.

Love you always and forever,

Your Kimba.'

I don't think i've ever been as broken in my life, the girls are crying alongside me but i don't want their arms wrapping around me. I don't want them to tell me it's gonna be ok. I want Kimberley to tell me that.

I'm physically shaking, tears are drenching my clothes, my head hurts from the fact i'm trying to accept what's happened but it's too hard to believe.

"I didn't even say goodbye."

This is the second to last update, hope you're all liking it and i will update the last part in an hour or so!❤️