ZAWADI'S JOURNEY TO SELF IDENTITY

HORTON

(I decided to call this part horton which by the way is my favourite animation but which is also the main cause of my Tuesday night's condition)

"O hell no! Not horton again,i mean come on lets get real for a minute here please. Just how many times are we going to repeat watching this animation?"

I found myself yelling at me but cautiously making sure that no one present in the room with me could catch a glimpse. For as long as my brain could piece together all the events of my recent life we have been watching this animation for like forever. I just couldn't  collect why these people here with me in the room never grew tired of this thing.

So here i was sited  on my big bro's uncomfortable couch
staring at his thirty two flat inch screen, wearing a face of dislike and total disappointment as the Tv rays fall on my naked eye balls forcing me to perceive and visualise these weird and terrible non human creatures talk and do other numerous things that one would expect only genuine human beings to do and by "genuine human beings"  I mean the class of homo sapiens sapiens.. That make us. The movie was softly killing me.

Though am not even sure i was watching it or was i just so used to it that even if i tried making myself busy with my mobile phone i couldn't escape the voices of the characters that had clearly been printed on the layers of my subconscious and conscious brain over time of repeated view of the movie? 

" Wait a minute... Am I not sited on my best couch, watching the  my favourite animation on the same screen i have always praised?? What is really going on with me?"

Well i have a thing that even i cant explain, for animations. I really enjoy watching them. I don't know why. Maybe its because they are always full of weird looking personified characters, or because they always seem to have the most beautiful world of their own, or maybe its the genius brains behind them. But i strongly hold on to the fact that they always have a teaching or lesson to be learned at the end of the numerous laughs, low moments and heroic acts they contain.

I have always enjoyed this one but tonight the feeling all seemed different. The funny parts that always cracked my ribs tonight had no effect at all. Truth is i don't quite understand what was going through my mind as i glued my eyes on the glaring screen. My everyday sweet food was tonight bitter herbs that caused my soul unrest.

The night had just begun a bit well until my two year old niece bursted out crying over what clearly seemed to be for no apparent reason at all then she  demanded for the animation. Now i don't know if the long day was the reason my morale for watching a movie had died or if it was something stirred up by the awfully piercing high pitched screams of my niece. All in all i was just off and the movie was only making it worse.

A good part of this "Tues" day had been so long, boring and full if disappointments. And all i wished for was a little peace. However that was just a wish and we know what would happen if they were horses. But still i needed a cool one after having such a rough day. You know one like in the movies where the protagonist retreats into a lonely place in an attempt to run away from him/herself and their surrounding. A silent place with no disturbance or some loud boring movie playing.

There they will either venture into crying their burdens away accompanied by a series of flashbacks of the people they have let down or of missions they have failed and this they will do calmly. Or they could also resort into bursting it all out by kicking, punching and throwing off of valuables into a shutter with no one to intervene, just themselves. What is important in all these is they get to re collect themselves and eventually make  wiser decisions that always make them our heroes and herons.

That is all i wanted tonight... Was it so hard to be granted??