Broken Boy (Niall Horan)

Chapter 8: Jess' POV

SURPRISE. I COULDN'T SLEEP.

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Jess's POV:

I haven't spoken to Niall for 2 weeks. He hasn't contacted me since the day he found Dylan and I in the parking lot of my flat. 

I can't belive he found out like that. I'm such a selfish person. This guilt is literally eating me away. How could I do this to him? According to the curly haired bastard, Harry, Niall hadn't moved or eaten for a week. He was only drinking scotch, and refuses to shower. To add to this, he staya up all day and night waiting reality TV shows, which I know for a fact he hates. 

I've driven this man back to the deep end. 

At least he's not cutting, it would kill me to know I caused him to turn to that again. To cause him so much despair. 

Dylan doesn't deserve this, to not know his dad, just because I was afraid Niall would turn on me. He would never do that. Niall is so sweet, and I can see that now. I was so stupid. So ignorant. So weak. Such a coward. 

I'm to blame. Not Niall. No one else but myself, because I brought this mess onto everyone I love, and I'm hurting them all so much.

I just hope one day Niall can meet his son. 

I want Niall to be able to hold him and hug him and love him like I'm able to. He deserves that. He deserves everything from me. 

Dylan needs his father. And Niall needs to be able to get to know him. I screwed up so badly, and I need to fix this. 

Niall's POV:

"Mate." I hear a distant voice call me. "Niall, come on. Wake up."

I groan, rolling over to face the back of the couch. Seriously, Harry, piss off. A hard smack echos through the house as a pillow crashes onto my face. I shoot up, anger seeping from my body.

"What the hell, man! Leave me alone!" I punch Harry in the leg, and bury my head back into the pillow. This time Harry grabs my legs and shoves me off the couch.

"You have't moved, eaten, showered, or been sober for the past 2 weeks. Get off your pathetic ass and do something for God's sake, Niall! Acting like a damn child about this isn't going to solve anything! You need to be a man, show that you want this! You're a father, so start acting like it!" Harry glared, pulling me up by my shirt collar.

I grumbled, rubbing my eyes. "Imagine, this Harry. Your girlfriend, ups and leaves one day, and you think it's all your fault. You become manically depressed. No one can help you. You try to commit suicide, which fails, and wind up ina hospital, where she then shows up, 3 years after leaving, trying to apologize. Then I act like a total ass, so when I go back to say my sorrys, I find out she has a CHILD. WHO HAPPENS TO BE MINE." I scream as I near the end of my rant, my voice cracking at the thought of my son.

Harry stands there, blinking, until he embraces me, silently allowng me to cry on his shoulder.

"It's okay. Everything will end out okay. I promise." Harry whispers, trying to hold my trembling body still.

"Everything will be okay." 

I stand back, wiping my eyes. 

" I need to see them." I choke, my cheeks flaming red from the tears.

"You need to shower." Harry complains, scrunching up his nose. I smack him, but proceed to the bathroom anyway. 

Once showered, which I admit feels nice after being filthy for 14 days, I ask Harry to drive me. I don't want to panic and leave, or not feel stable enough to drive. Luckily, my hangover calmed down, and the headache I woke up to is gone. 

As Harry pulls up to the apartment complex, he turns to me.

"Just stay calm. Be mature. Don't think about your anger, think about that boy who's never met his father." Harry sighs, a tired smile on his lips.

I nod. "Okay. Thank you, Harry." I step outside his car, waving him goodbye. After climbing 3 flights of stairs, I reach her flat. I shuffle outside for a bit, before deciding to man up an knock. 

God, what if she doesn't answer?

What is she ignores me?

What if she not home?

My worries are silened when Jess opens the door, hair disheveled and clothing a mess. She's still beautiful. My heart clenches.

"N-Niall?" She stutters, taken aback.

I let my lips turn into a small smile.

"I was wondering if I could meet my son."