Slight tw- self harm.
She looked at her stomach. Red lines from an hour ago. Nobody would see those except for her boyfriend. Oh well he wouldnt care. When was the last time she saw him? A week ago? She didnt know and.. She didnt care. A silent tear slipt out of her eye. She was supposed to be doing maths homework but she was sat in a corner in her room looking at the sunset. It will all be okay in the end..
She loved sunsets. They were beautiful. The red and yellow and blues mixing to make rainbow colours and sometimes patterns makes it all worthwhile. She wished it could be like this all the time. A break from all the stress and all the pressure. She understood why people smoked, did drugs and drank. She grabbed her stitch plushie and clasped it to her chest. Social expectations destroy people. She just wished she could draw and sing and write as she pleased without being critisized. "Its too weird" "you cant sing for shit" "it looks stupid" "what is it even supposed to be?".
She hated it. She enjoyed the simple things in life. Different aesthetics made her calm. Cloud. Old fashioned. Coloured. Stars. Video games. Autumn. Christmas. So many different ones just made her happy. She would attempt to draw them sometimes. Suddenly her phone buzzed with her text tone. Her boyfriends name lit up her phone. She was hesitant but remembered he would get angry otherwise... She grabbed her phone and looked at the message
'Hope your okay baby..cxx'
Her heart saddened a bit. Does she tell him the truth? No.. Thats stupid. He will get upset and that would cause so many problems. She wished she could just stop. Just stop overthinking and being scared that if she did something.. She would upset someone.. But she cant. You cant just stop doing it. She messaged him back saying,
"Im okay, are you? xx"
It was a lie. She wish she could just tell someone the truth. Somebody. But she could trust no one
No one at all.
A/N. This all just happened. Im going to be writing more after college. No ones gonna see this anyway..
