November 7th 2004
Mary’s coughing seemed to be worse today. John had a hard time accepting that he was annoyed with her coughing. Even worse, over the past couple of days, he had been growing more annoyed with little things she did. His own selfishness shocked him.
Of course he still loved Mary more than anything else in the world, but he couldn’t deny that the past couple of weeks hadn’t been easy. Today was an ice cold example of that. John was sitting at the wooden dining table in the living room, as Mary was lying down in the comfortable chair, under a warm blanket, listening to the sounds of the radio. John saw how the music took her back to better times. It would have had the same effect on him, if it hadn’t been continuously interrupted by Mary’s coughing, which was getting so intense that John was afraid that she wouldn’t be able to come out of it. And then, just as sudden as she started, the coughing stopped, and she fell into a deep sleep, that made her look so calm that John frequently had to check whether she was still breathing.
On those rare moments that his wife didn’t need care, John was sitting at the table, reading a magazine without moving a fiber in his body. The house was filled with a bitter cold atmosphere. They didn’t say a word to each other. John knew that the only person in the world who understood him, was about to leave him, apparently without putting up a fight. Mary hardly ate or drank anything. She had given up, that was crystal clear to him and he blamed her for it.
And he felt like Mary was angry with him as well. She didn’t look at him and she didn’t want to be touched. It made John very insecure about whether he did too much for her, or too little. There was so much tension in the house, so intense even, that it almost made John long for the moment it was over. It was a thought that made him hate himself.
Every once in a while – when Mary was asleep - he found distraction in a song on the radio that enabled him too, to travel back to happier times. It was inconceivable to him that the adventure that had begun so long ago, was about to end. And even worse: was about to end like this.
YOU ARE READING
Dinner with God
RomanceJohn would give up everything to see Mary, the love of his life one more time. Years after her tragic death, his wish becomes reality when she is back in his life. But how...and why? When John meets a mysterious man, he makes a painful discovery: Ma...
