We Met on a Train, While I Was Dry Humping Uncle Daniel #gotcaketour

We Met on a Train, While Your I was dry humping Uncle Daniel

-Beau-

"Don't you think it's time for you to sleep now?" i asked my 11 year old daughter

"Not really, I don't have to sleep for another half hour." She replied 

"Well, how about I give you your phone back and you go do your own thing until bed time?" 

"Yeah, that's cool"

I gave her back her phone and she sat down on the sofa again.

"Dad, how did you and mum meet? Cuz this girl mentioned me in a tweet and said 'Watchin the video where #nabeau started if ur mum wasn't sitting there u wouldn't of been brought into this world'

"Right, it happened when we were going to record for a video"

{  harp thing from the TV shows }

"You and Daniel go sit next to that girl, and do the thing you practised" Jai instructed.

"I dunno, she looks kind of pissed, I don't wanna get punched" I replied looking over to the brunette, sitting by a window.

"Don't be a pu$$y Bew" Jai replied.

"Shut up Jye" I snapped back.

Me and Daniel sat down next to her. 

I put one leg over the other and Daniel put his hand on my thigh

"So we gonna get home and fuck?" I asked daniel in my campest voice

"We always do that every night, fucking hell babe" He replied.

"Whats with the pimples on you d!ck? I'm scared"

"What?!"

"It's scary!"

"I don't fucking have pimples, they're just red marks" 

Daniel rested his head on my shoulder. I moved my head up and saw the girl, who looked of an Asian descent, her lips were pressed in a line and her eyes were closed. I swear I heard her mutter 'give me strength before i chop off this guys pimpled d!ck' 

"Go to sleep" I told Daniel.

He began kissing my neck. I got up and straddled Daniel and began dry humping him. 

The girl must've felt the movement because before I knew it she got up and changed sides. I got off Daniel and saw the girl glare at me.

I got up and changed sides.

"I'm sorry, but we were making a video for YouTube. We're the Janoskians and this was for our video Awkward Train Situations. Can we use the footage, or do you want us to blur out your face"

"It's fine, but next time you and your boyfriend should wait until your home" She said with a smirk, and an English accent.

"Were- I'm not- I'm straight" I managed to choke out.

She pouted.

"Damn, I really wanted a gay Australian best friend, here's me going to give you my number and telling you to call me so we can go and have a coffee and shop til we drop"

"Well, I can be your Australian boyfriend, and I'll take you on a shopping spree in Victoria's Secret. Always good for a mans opinion from the stuff in there"

"Hold the boyfriend and the Victoria's Secret and yeah, it should be fun"

"Damn!" I said pulling out my phone.

She took it and put her number in and the name as 'GirlWithTheSexyAccent;)'

"Nice to meet you, Girl with the Sexy accent"

"Nice to meet you too Beau Brooks" She said getting up and going to the door just before the train stopped at the station

"Wait!" I yelled confused, but she gave me a wave and got off the train.

"Mum thought you were gay?" Alisha laughed, interrupting my story

"Yep, then 2 days later we met up and went shopping, just before I was about to leave, I pushed her against a wall and kissed her then about 4 years later the same technique helped us make you"

She scrunched her nose.

"You've had 11 years of experience, yet you don't know when its the right time to just shush?"

"I'm gonna need another 11, being a parent isn't  easy you know. And if anyone asks how we met, you just say we met on a train, while I was dry humping uncle Daniel, then walk off with an innocent face"

" You and all my uncles must've been some horny teenagers, I'm surprised that I don't have any siblings" She said as she got up and headed for the stairs.

I laughed, I have a strong feeling that by the time shes in secondary school, she won't need sex-ed lessons.

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My entry for the #gotcaketour fanfic competition