I live with half a heart. Literally. It lies around a simple silver chain around my neck. It's quite bland really. Just half of a silver heart on a chain, nothing spectacular. I hate it though.
I hate everything about it. I hate how it looks, how it feels.
I hate how it has taken over my life. Although technically it has not taken over my life because this necklace is my life. I'm reminded about it every second look at it because this evil thing is apart of me.
I don't want to find out who has the other half of this necklace because I know it will not be who I want. That's why we have to wear these wretched things. Everyone is born with one; half of one. Whoever has the other half is your true match, so they say.
Yet to me love is not something that can be forced upon. It's just something that happens.
To me love is two best friends falling in love, not two strangers having the same necklace, getting warmer as you get closer. That's not love.
But what do I know, right. I'm only seventeen.
Yet here, seventeen is almost too late. That's the bad part about these stupid necklaces. We have until the age of eighteen to find our true match.
I've always wondered who created these necklaces. People say it started back in the 21st century, after World War III. Others say this is how it's been since the beginning of time. I say we'll never know.
I'll never know.
I'll never know how it feels to be loved. I'll never know how it feels to love someone. I'll never know because of this necklace. and I think I could live with that. Considering I only have 150 days left. I don't have much more living to do.
Surviving is what I refer to it as.
Don't get me wrong there are few people who are happy with this. My parents are a prime example. Unless they're really good actors. They keep telling me I need to hurry, considering my lack of time.
"You need to be more like Aiden. He found his early on. Now he's happily married with three kids." He can't be happy though, it's not possible. I've always tried to ask him about how he feels about Aria, but all he says is love.
I've been lying in my bed for hours now, wondering about this curse I have been given. It's a burden really. Maybe when I'm dead I'll figure it out. I hope so.
