The Unconventional Choices

Chapter 6

   I almost choked on my cocktail and spit out the mojito hearing Sunil's statement. I glared at Pavan who seemed to be having fun messing with me.

     "I love your boyfriend, Tanya. He's a great guy." Pavan still had a sense of humor on his face but his words sounded genuine.

     "Fiance." Sunil corrected as he lifted my hand to point out the ring to Pavan.

   Pavan's expression first turned into shock which then turned into amusement. "Interesting." He said looking at me.

   That morning was undoubtedly the most uncomfortable part of the weekend. Luckily, the weekend was over soon and it was time to head back. Sunil and I didn't see a lot of each other for the next few days as we were both held up with work, which was kind of a good thing as I had still not figured out how to make things right with him. What happened with Pavan was also left unanswered as we never talked about it. But besides a little tension between us whenever we bumped into each other at work, everything was back to normal.

   Even though there were no changes in my surroundings, the confusion and conflicts within me was causing a chaos. Sunil ignored to talk about anything that bothered us and every time I looked down at my ring I only felt frustration and no love. I had only made things worse by kissing Pavan which gave rise to new confusions. At one point I felt that I would much rather be happier with Pavan than Sunil. I thought of shaking off the thought but I couldn't just ignore the truth anymore just because I didn't have the courage to deal with it. Saturday was just two days away and I would have to have arrived at a firm decision before the next time I met Sunil.

   After a lot of thinking, I had made a decision by Saturday afternoon. I told myself that it was what I had decided and I would just go along with it over and over.

   After waiting for what seemed like forever, I heard the knock on my door. I took a deep breath before answering it.

     "Hey, what was so important?" Pavan wondered by the door. I smiled and invited him in.

     "Okay first of all, I want you to know that this was not an easy decision for me to take but it had me wondering so much that I had to give it a shot." I admitted.

     "Alright. And that decision involves me somehow?" He asked with an amused expression.

     "Yes, I just felt that.. I don't know how you might take it but.. the timing might not even be right but lately, I've been feeling.." I trailed off not finding the right words.

     "Tanya." Pavan interrupted. "I don't know what you're trying to tell me, and it might be important but I have something important to do too, and I'm running late." He confessed.

     "Running late for what?" I asked.

     "I have a plane to catch, literally." He stressed. "When I had that fight with my girlfriend and then went alone to the beach, I was feeling kind of sad, but just convinced myself that I was going to feel that way until the next girl would come around and then I would be fine. But I'm not. I miss her, I really do. She's in London on a conference for a month. I thought I'll wait for her until she gets back to make things right, but I don't think I can. I want to see her now and fight for her."

   As I slowly tried to absorb everything he said, I felt dizzy and forgot how to talk.

   He walked closer and held my hands. "And when I saw you there that night, I might have confused my feelings but the reason I felt so lucky to see you there was because I found my friend when I needed the utmost comfort." He said squeezing my hands.

     "Yes! That's exactly what I felt." I uttered involuntarily. "You're right, I just started to understand why I kissed you. I had just had a breakdown and I was looking for comfort and there you were, my friend." I admitted as the realization hit me.

     "I'm so glad we can always be there for each other." He said with a wide smile.

   I smiled back and nodded and then we pulled each other into a friendly hug.

     "So, is there anything else you wanted to share?" He asked pulling away from the hug, an urgency in his tone as he glanced at his watch.

     "No, we can talk some other time. Now hurry or you'll miss your flight, and your girl." I encouraged.

   With a quick smile, he hurriedly headed out the door.

   I felt like a huge weight was lifted off me. I was so glad that I didn't say all the things that I actually didn't feel for Pavan and ruin his possible relationship and cover myself with embarrassment. My issues with Sunil had certainly nothing to do with Pavan. I was just looking for an escape instead of facing the problem and finding a solution. I stared down at the diamond present Sunil had put on my finger and realized that a mark which was supposed to stand for commitment had lately been giving me a feeling of imprisonment.

   My thoughts were interrupted by a ping on my cellphone and it was from the devil I was just thinking about. I took a deep breath to prepare myself for whatever was coming.

   'I have a big surprise waiting for you at dinner.' The message read.

   I humorously wondered if the surprise would be diamond hand cuffs this time.