Diary of a drug addict

Diary of a drug addict

By Gabriel Higdon

Before I start this story, let me tell you, I have done many drugs, so many drugs, more drugs than anyone I know. And I know a lot about the drugs I have done, how they affect the brain, how to make them stronger, how to treat overdoses, I know most of what there is to know. And I will give you my knowledge, so that you may use responsibly and in moderation. I hope this book promotes harm reduction and extends the readers life. Good luck, and always make sure that while having fun, you stay safe.

I had help from some friends writing this book

I want to thank Matthew Busch, and Tasha Byler for their support and help.

Also thanks to all my friend in SAFPF who told me to believe in myself, and that my book was worth reading.

Thank you dad for keeping me alive long enough to realize that life is worth living.

Upon the endless waters of my infinite mind, I will drift in bliss as mother opium sings her soft lullaby, in that place there is no time, and I am forever. As I fade from bliss into the blue ,rush of death, I know it's ok, peace washes over me and I become everything, I remember that once I was bodiless, and I remember the time before birth, I see the stars that move and are millions in number, I see everything around me and move as vapor, So much more aware in death than in life, I realize that life was the dream and that death is me waking up to reality, none of it was a dream and as I realize this I sense that I revolve around something so massive, which could only be god, I do not ask why god created me with so much pain in this moment that is no moment as moments do not exist, I ask nothing because I realize That I understand that I cannot understand

I am

I was a heavy drug addict, my name is Gabriel Higdon. I used for 8 years straight, I have overdosed and stopped breathing multiple times. I am now recovered, maybe reading this will help you or other people who are in the situation I was in. I want people to not follow in my path, or if they do, I want them to know how to use the drugs right and safely. Know that my story is similar to billions of people. We all need help, I hope this book also helps people feel empathy and/or sympathy for the dope head living in an alleyway.

Onward with the story, I started using drugs when I was six years old. I was diagnosed with ADD like so many others in my generation, though I am still not sure this wasn't a misdiagnosis, I wonder if was just schizoaffective. The doctor prescribed me Ritalin. For those who think doing prescription medicine for medical reasons is not drug addiction, you're wrong. The definition of addiction is the need of a substance, action, person, place or thing to cope with your life, and being psychologically or physically incapable of living without it.

So in using Ritalin to concentrate in school, and being unable to live a happy life without it, I became a drug addict. I did not fully realize that the Ritalin was a drug all those years of using it. I just knew I took a pill every day and without it I was dysfunctional. I do not think it was a coincidence that at six years old, I began to see shadow people and hear voices. I know that schizophrenia runs in my family, and symptoms were present before the use of Ritalin, but the Ritalin definitely made things worse.

When I first heard the voices, I was seeing how long I could stay awake with my sister. It was around three in the morning that I began to hear whispers inside of me and around me at the same time. The air became visible, and I began to be able to see what I now believe was the subatomic particles that make up the universe. Then again maybe that's just the disease convincing me that I am sane, and that what I see is real. Everything moved without moving at all, and I felt as if I was dreaming.