The world is a very interesting place to live in, if we are honest. We never know what we are getting into. I am thankful for the unexpected turns. It has given me a sense of purpose and a reason to keep going. Regardless of what they might be. I need to prove that I am someone important. That's why I dance. Ballet has given me a reason to keep going for many years now. It keeps my mind and body busy. That's why I'm at the studio now, perfecting my fifth position. I can never be the best if I don't practice even more basic steps. I twirl, twirl, twirl in between to keep up with the speed of an actual routine. I need this to be perfect. I have to get into San Francisco's Ballet School. They have a wonderful program and 100% graduation rate. The professors are the kings and queens of the stage. I know that this college that I'm at isn't for me. This degree isn't what my heart is set at. That's what keeps me motivated. I slow down and stretch to cool down before taking one last look at myself in the mirror. I study my imagine to see what I need to improve before going out with Nora. My chocolate brown colored hair falling out of the bun is a big flaw I see. Next is how pasty my skin is,not that I can fix that tonight but make up will help. I need to brighten up my grey eyes, but I know that's a large task. I need to rinse off so I don't look so greasy too, but that's a given.
I go through and gather my things. I try to make sure I take my phone off of Bluetooth, not making that mistake again. Kelsey still judges me for how long it took me to realize the reason why I couldn't listen to my music in the shower . It wasn't because I broke my speakers,but that I was terrifying her in the studio with my music and text tone going off with no source. I turn on the cold water and pull out my bath soap. It's the middle of the day so no one is here yet, classes don't start until 4. I turn on my music and take off my clothes. I put on a pop playlist to sing and dance with while I shower. It's my favorite part of the day, the part of the day with no expectations. The only time I can have no distractions. Consequently, it can also be the scariest part of the day. The times where I have no one to talk me out of the dark thoughts. I try to wash them away as I scrub my body. I don't wash my hair, I don't have enough time for that today and I forgot my blow dryer anyway. I dry off and put dry shampoo though my hair trying to give it some volume. I put on a simple short sleeved black dress that goes to the bend of my knee and tights with black sheer tights. I hear my phone vibrate on the sink but I ignore it as I knew it was Nora telling me to hurry. I ignore it as I rush to throw on some make up and redo my bun. Black is so easy to style and match, it's why it's majority of my clothes. I put my dirty clothes and slippers in my gym bag and grab my white flats and pearls. I take one last look in the mirror before walking out. I check my phone and see the text from Nora.Seriously?? You told me you'd be done by 2 and it's 2:15. Waiting beside your car
Hurry 😩😩
The list keeps going but I just smile and swipe them away. I'll be there in a second anyway. I wave bye to Lynn, the front clerk of the studio. I see my silver little car and Nora's red Ford Explorer beside it. I see her twist her lips up as she saw me. I knew she would be mad, this is just her being over dramatic though. I wave dramatically to her to show I see her. She smiles and rolls her eyes, her eyes are so ice blue it's hard to miss the even from far away.Her fire red hair is curled and neatly styled, barely brushing her shoulders. It's usually stick straight to it's a rarity too see it so nicely done. As I slide into her car after dropping off my bag into my car, I notice the off white bell sleeved dress she's wearing.
"You look cute! I love your necklace." She always starts off with compliments when she first sees me. Always even if we are fighting.
"Thanks, I love that dress on you. Beauty inside and out," I say back winking at her. She laughs and rolls her eyes once again.
"You know you don't have to go to this with me, right?" She asks as she pulls out onto the road. I'm focusing on finding the right playlist. I just smile and tell her i want to go. I might not have the biggest and best family but she does. Roommate privileges, she knows I know have a half decent reason to come now.
"This drive is going to be long if you don't talk, I know you're depressed but cmon." She turns to smile at me as we pull up to a red light. I smile and sigh.
"Okay. You're right. I just am tired from practice. I keep trying to perfect the basics so I can be ready for the more complicated ones. I know it's dumb but I feel like that's what I have been missing. I was too cocky." I watch her drive and see watch her face light up. She enjoys our alone time.
"Thank makes perfect sense to me. I think it's a building block move. Have firm foundation, have strong house kinda thing." That's what I love about her. She will make sure she understands by placing situations she's not well studied in into terms she does know. "Exactly." I say as I pick up my water bottle and take a drink. "Anyway, what're you doing this weekend? You never gave me a concrete answer." I ask looking over at her. She bites her bottom lip, nervous. "Well... I have a date tomorrow night." She finally admits. I raise my brow at that. "Oh? Anyone I know?" She shakes her head and laughs nervously.
"Um.. I met him on bumble." I roll my eyes, she knows how I feel about those apps. That's why she was hesitant to tell me about the date.
"Get off your high horse over there missy. You know it's just the easiest way in a college town."
"I know it's true, doesn't mean I enjoy that fact though. Bars aren't much better." I finally admit myself."You need to get out and date a little or make new friends with different interests. I love having you around but I know you must be lonely. You love your dance girls but you said yourself before that someone's it's extremely irritating to talk because often dance is the only thing you have in common." She looks straight ahead, even at the red light. I knew she was right deep down.
"I love you and I love my nights alone with Luna." Just because I know she's right doesn't mean I let her know too.
"The cat will always be there, you can grown your cat family even! But you need human interaction too. That's all I'm saying. I'll drop it for now." Thank god.
We drive the rest of the way to her grandparents in small talk.
YOU ARE READING
Twinkle Toes
RomanceCarmen Brown has loved ballet ever since she was four years old. It has been her first and only passion for the past 15 years. It distracts her from the real world and the problems it comes with. Life has been off for a few years for Karma and she i...