DOING DRUGS SO I CAN MAINTAIN PART OF THE REASON THAT I CAN HANDLE THIS DAMN PAIN ,"IM FUKING NUMB" SAID THE LONELY HEART OF THE DRUMMER BOY WHO RATHER WREAK HAVOC THAN TO PLAY AROUND WITH A TONKA TOY .UGH SHIT MY MIRROR AINT BEEN CLEARER LATELY IVE SEEN MY MIND BECOME MATERIAL MASTAKEN LIFE INDULGING IN THE THINGS THAT ARE FOREVER BROKEN IVE SEEN A FATHER LOSE HIS SON WHY LIFE SO FUCKING HOPELESS? CONCEPT OF MY DEPRESSION IS THAT THERES NO FUCKING RECOLLECTION WHEN YOUR BIRTH BEGINS AND THERES NOBODY THERE TO HOLD YOU WHEN THE PAIN BEGINS BUT THERES SOMEBODY THERE TO FOLD YOU WHEN YOUR CAVING UGH YUH SUCH DISCUSSED BY SUCH AND SUCH YOUR A FUCKING LOSER MAN WELL LIFES A FUCKING UPPERCUT RIGHT INSIDE MY FUCKING GUT WANNA FUCKING ND IT BUT I DONT HAVE THE BALLS TO FUCK IM SUCH A PUSSY FUCK ME UP...