Becoming His

Chapter 4 - Good Enough

Christian

Me having a thing for this girl will probably end badly but it's been 4 months and I feel like shit every time I'm not near her. We'd been out so many times, but I was still hesitant on pulling her into my life. I knew she wasn't like the other girls I usually toyed with, so I had to come correct.

Every time I saw her all I wanted to do was rip her clothes off and just fuck her. Just thinking about her begging me to go harder and deeper made me stiffen. This want wasn't a feeling I was used to, and it isn't one I'm sure I like. It's simple, if I was horny, I would find some chick to handle it, but with Alesha it was different; it couldn't be some random girl, it had to be her. I needed her in my life before and after, so I shouldn't risk fucking that up right?

I know she's getting annoyed with the mixed signals I'm sending, hell, so was I. It's hard keeping my hands off of her when we're together I can't move past flirting knowing the potential threats of being with her. If she found out about what it is my family does, I would be surprised if she didn't run as far and fast as her feet could take her. Would I even let her go once she was mine? I've always been a selfish man, bringing her into this life just to keep her would be the biggest example of that selfishness.

I've been up all night weighing the pros and cons of being with her, but the list was not working in my favor. Every scenario ended with her hurt someway, somehow. I wanted her, only her and there's no doubt in my mind that I would probably kill any guy she even tries dating. Everything was telling me not to go any further and to spare her the constant fear, worry and anxiety of being with me. The pinging notification cut short my internal debate, I checked my phone and saw she had sent me a text.

AM 👑: Hey. If you're alive, where was my good morning text? If you're dead, where was my good morning text? 😒 I know you're probably nervous about that investors meeting this morning, but don't be, you'll do great. Talk later? Good Luck 😘

She has me grinning like a fool at a text?! What the fuck is she doing to me? Cutting myself off from her is gonna be a lot harder than I thought, but it's the only way to keep her safe and away from any of this shit. Throwing the phone down on my bed, I lose the nerve to text her back knowing from here on out we'll be nothing to one another. I won't like seeing her with anyone else and I can't promise I won't act on my impulses if we're alone. Complete disconnect is what we need.

I got up, took a shower and got dressed. My 'investors meeting' with the head of the Bratva was to discuss a merger of our organizations. I got downstairs, seeing my main guards Antoni and Sebastian at the breakfast bar talking and eating from a lineup of food. I walked past them heading to the door, they immediately got up following closely behind. Getting in the car, we made our way to my grandfather's house.

Parking in front of the mansion, we got out and headed for the front door. Since my grandma berated me about not having any manners that one time I was running late, pulled up and had my grandpa jump in the car, I've made sure to always say hey to Grams, no matter what. She opened the door with a bright smile, dressed effortlessly in a floor length yellow dress. She pulled me into her and kissed my cheek, doing the same to the boys behind me. There wasn't even a good morning before she started offering us food suggesting we were looking too thin. I rolled my eyes at the guys making their way to the kitchen for yet another meal.