My name is Brooke Jones and I am the reason my mom is dead. I'm just going to flat out say it. A month ago, my mom died. We went out on a girls night. We had gone to the fair at one of the Catholic elementary schools. It was popular for its big rides so everyone went there. We were walking down the street when I got a text. I stopped on the sidewalk and she was crossing the street. There was a turn there and the speed limit was thirty. I remember every detail. 

"Brooke, hurry up. If you want to meet your friend there then we need to go before they sell out of the wristbands to rideevery ride." She turned around. If only I had listened. She was in the middle of the one way street waiting for me to come. "One second. Maria is texting me." Next thing I knew a car was coming at ninety miles per hour. "Mom, move!" I yelled. Too late. One lady that had her two boys walking with her screamed. She immediately pulled out her phone and dialed nine one one. I sat there. Stunned. Shocked. Scared. Very, very, very scared of what had happened to my loving mother. I saw her. Laying there. Blood everywhere. She was in an awkward position. I ran next to her. "Mommy. Hey, hey. It's okay, it's okay. People are coming to help you. I promise you'll be okay, okay?" Tears roll down my eyes as she looks at me. Tears filling her eyes. The lady ran over to us leaving her two boys on the sidewalk. "Are you okay?" She yelled. "Are they coming?" I say through the tears. She nods at me. She looks at my mother who's still looking at me. I touch her face. Her hair. "I love you, mommy. I promise you'll make it." Next thing I knew the paramedics moved me out if the way. The hospital was just a mile away from here. They took her and put inside the truck. They told me to get in and we drove to the hospital. She died of blood loss. Seven twenty seven PM is when my mother died. She was fourty four with three kids and a husband. I didn't keep my promise. She left this earth in pain and I promised her she would make it. She didn't make it. My mother is gone. Forever. And I lied to her face. I had little hope she would make it. I promised her a promise that couldn't be kept. God took my angel of a mother to heaven, and I didn't want her to go. That day haunts me forever. If I had just walked towards her. Just walked with her to the sidewalk, she would be here right now. Probably laughing like she always did. She was such a happy person. I was too. It's my fault and I carry this guilt everywhere. I told everyone what happened. They said it wasn't my fault. The driver killed her. She's the one who stood in the middle of the street. No one told her too. Yeah, but all I and to do was walk ten feet and she would be here. But she's not. Because I'm too much a a dumbass to think about any of that. Like the fact that maybe she shouldn't be standing in the middle of the road. Maybe I should just do what she says and walk. But no. It's my fault my mother is dead. The only person who truly understands me. I have no friends. My father doesn't care enough about me. My siblings are nice but my mom got it. She knew me well. I was moms favorite. Dad loves Sophia and Caleb more than me. I'm just the dumb mistake. The youngest. The stupid one. I'll never live up to my siblings because they're so much better at everything. At least, that's what dad says. Mom never said those things though. She actually loved me. I actually loved her. We did a lot together. As dark and terrible as it sounds, it should've been dad. He hates me. I hate him. You get it, I'm sure. A bad relationship between a daughter and her father. There's a lot of those stories so I'm sure it's nothing new anyone's heard. Lots of people have daddy issues. Some just have it worse than others. Some have a perfect life with the perfect relationship with their parents that are still alive. 

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