POISONOUS LOVE

Two

I tried to escape today I've been doing that for the past months and every time I do I got further away than the last time. Where I reach I left a mark once am done go even further just so it won't  seems suspicious.

To me my life is like a test I get stronger with every challenge. I don't pity myself . Why should I? Yes i get hits until am black and blue until am numb until i pass out at times. I some times don't eat am use to that. I'm still not living the worst i still breathe and that, that right there is enough for me to keep fighting that means i still have a chance.

An opening
An escape
An opportunity

And that's not death that's the easy way out of things i want to be able to look back at this same day and i want to say yes i did fight for me i fought to be free to be happy and to be an inspiration to other yes they can do it.
So no it won't be death i will get help and i know dorn well I will be happy again. This question is when?

The beat me breathless each time I escape maybe the want to beat the memories out I don't know I really don't want to know what goes on in those sick brains of theirs. Or maybe they want to dim me hope but that they aren't strong enough to do. They can do all they want they won't take that away from me. The only thing they can do is kill me and they would be signing their death certificates. And God won't allow that. He gives me strength he gives me hope he wants me to fight he wants me to push on so that I will do he has a plan.

The Painful reality is this is my story, my pain, my blood, my sweat, my body and soul. When I lay in my bed at night my demons are at ease not all the time but in my dreams I am a conqueror, I escape I climb higher than I ever did.

Now it's hard to keep that faith when tomorrow comes and it's the same thing. But my real tomorrow is yet to come that tomorrow when I wake up I wake up with peace in my soul and love in my heart I can laugh loud for the whole world to hear. I can shear a bed with someone who I love and who loves me even more. Where can be me and be happy.

It's being a month now i haven't tried to escape since the last time. Now i find ways to give them a run for their money. Like their food oh the saying true the best way to get a man is through his belly. I cook so i know my way with food especially what to add and not. Smirk.

Like my sweet husband Christopher he, he hates anything spicy just like the rest but I. I love extra spicy things I travel in it. So some time I purposely burse peppers in their foods make it really fresh or sleeping pills to air foods or drink or that pill for diarrhea. My cat is mix with tiger rare addy drinks and eat from their food before I hand it over to them and that is not healthy at all but I can't help it and you can't blame me. Addy like to turn their shoe into his own bathroom also. Deep down am laughing watching their faces turn red while am eating like a "General." Welps at least am eating at the table with Christopher and his seven dewarfs. No they are not short well they are like his foot mat.

My phone is track so i can't do much on it so I turn to my laptop beside am Christopher main business partner so I still need to know what is going on and he isn't quick to trust doubt he wants anyone to know his he deals with his. I should laugh at this shit. I mean no amount of money can really buy silence especially if anyone of his workers the would rather sink his slimy arse. Man I would love to see that happen. Now I handle his cash I know what to do. Am taking Christopher down from his high and mighty steed and put him on the ground where he belong. I'm hacking the company's system METROL OIL CO. Yes it's an oil company that he sniffle from right under my fathers nose. But one thing I love about dad he always has a back up plan.

Christopher is one of the business man who don't check up on his company profit he is one arrogant arsehole don't think anyone would be brave enough to rip him off. So am the one who take care of this company beside if you look at it, it's mine and I have no problem running this shit bankruptcy to be honest I would rather someone else run this company other from my cruel husband.

I have a option to choose from but it would be different I would own my company and I am the boss no one else I have great plans for this oil company. But until then I have to keep planning my escape first. My painful reality is hoping that