I sit on Lachlan's bed staring at the door. Lachlan just got back. He's having supper, and I haven't seen him yet. Part of me feels bad. Lachlan just back from a mission, that very well could have killed him, and I'm all ready to jump on him the moment that he returns. I try to convince myself I'm not wrong. You're being fair. It has to be done at some point.
Lachlan's door opens and he sees me. He grins, then his face goes back to a frown. A frown he's worn so much for so long. I get that familiar feeling of wanting to do anything to make him happy...I push all of that out of my head and look at Lachlan evenly.
"We need to talk," I say straightening my posture to the best of my ability. Lachlan's face looks tired, and worn. I almost break. I almost hug him, and kiss his sweet, sorrowful face...but I don't. Instead I take a deep breath and get ready for confrontation.
"About What? I just got back, I don't really want to talk right not-"
"I don't care! I need answers. You keep pushing me to the side, putting me on the back burner. Lachlan, when will I stop being your last priority?" I yell. Lachlan looks taken aback by my immediate aggression.
"Where is this coming from? When have I ever made you anything but first priority?" Lachlan asks, immediately getting defensive.
"Are you kidding me, Lachlan? Every time I have a question about anything you say 'later', but then you never get around to it. You complain that I don't remember you but then-"
"Hold on! When have I ever complained?" Lachlan fumes. I don't listen to him.
"You complain, but when I try to talk to you, you entirely ignore me!" I say. Lachlan looks furious as her paces back and forth. He sighs.
"Well, I'm all ear now. What do you need to know?" He asks. I take a deep breath.
"First of all, the beggar," I say. Lachlan waves his hand as if he's dismissing the question.
"That ones easy. I was the beggar. When we first met there was terrible poverty, I used to dress in different disguises to get around the city," Lachlan says. I want smile. I want to praise him for his bravery. But I don't. I stay arms crossed, and stern.
"Second of all, the tree," I say taking a deep breath. My nerves are rising. Lachlan's eyebrows furrow as if he's confused.
"The tree? What about it?" He asks.
"Why does that tree make me angry? I hate to admit it but it does. It's a mockery of life, Lachlan! She's beautiful but enraging," I tell him. For a second he looks appalled, then he takes a deep breath, and his face is back to normal.
"I can't help you there. Maybe it's your muddled Center brain that hates life," He scoffs. I gasp. How could he say such a thing? I start to tear up. Lachlan gasps too, realizing too late what he said. Suddenly I feel the Yarrow in me take over.
"You bikking asshole! You think you're so hurt after my capture, my torture, my loss? Well, let me remind you, you are the one who left me. You thought I was dead so you left...without me," My voice breaks and I start to sob. Im Rowan again. I'd be lying if I said I blame Lachlan for what happened to me...but still...he's the easiest target right now. Lachlan clenches his teeth tighter. He looks like he's in physical pain.
"This isn't the time to tell you this," Lachlan says between clenched teeth. "But that's not what really happened at the Center." I'm not even surprised. I always had the feeling there was more to the story.
"Tell me," I say in a cold voice as I wipe away my tears. Lachlan cringes then tells the story. The true story. A terrible story.
"You didn't look in the bikking back?" I scream at him. Pushing him, shoving him. Lachlan has tears streaming down his face. Lachlan falls to his knees, arms outstretched to me.
"Oh, Rowan. I'm so sorry! I've lived with it everyday, lived with myself everyday. I hate myself for being so foolish! Rowan, I'm so sorry," He says desperately. This feels like a weird case of déjà vu. When has this happened before? I don't want to see someone I love and respect so much look so helpless. I take Lachlan's hand and help him to his feet. I sit him down on his bed, hugging him.
"I don't blame you," I whisper. We sit there embracing for several minutes before I finally break away from him.
"I remembered something," I say gently. I clutch my pink crystal in my hand. "I remember you giving it to me. Kissing me." Lachlan sucks in a breath. He's been waiting on me for so long.
"Is that all you remember?" He asks. I shrug.
"Little things...but nothing else important," I say trying to keep my voice high and hopeful. "I'll remember more...you know I will." Lachlan smiles sadly. He isn't convinced. I lean in and kiss him softly.
"I've missed you," I whisper.
"I've missed you too," He replies.
"Even if I never remember everything...even if I never remember you...I'll always be Rowan, not Yarrow."
YOU ARE READING
Elites of Eden: Yarrow Not Rowan
FanfictionWhat would happen if Rowan never got her memory back? What would happen if there was never an attack? Would she be happy living as a girl she can't remember being.