The Beast And The Harlot.

Chapter 5-"Warmness Of The Soul"

A/N: Sorry this chapter doesn't make sense, sorry I'm a shitty writer! sorry, sorry, sorry!. I'm determined to make this longer than the last chapter, and the next chapters longer in general. also I might not update next week. Tell me if you want me to update or not since I don't know how many people are reading this and if I should carry on! Also I just uploaded the first chapter of my 2nd fan fiction, so if you like the band "Muse", check it out! Anyway enjoy!

~The guys picked up Syn and are now at the bar~

Not too shabby for a "cool bar" Syn had spotted on his way to our hotel I admired to myself. The lights were dim and only lit up at the bar across from the booths that were lined up against the wall, with tables in the middle of the booths and bar, making trips to get drinks a hassle.

The previous night we all got drunk at the bar in the hotel, I don't remember much except the drinking and of course waking up next the man that is Brian Elwin Haner JR. My best guess is that Jimmy and Johnny went upstair to do some "business" while Matt phoned Valerie, his girlfriend and our old tour manager. Which just about leaves me with Brian, I assumed we carried on drinking, then, well one thing lead to another..

Sometimes I wish I didn't have feelings, yes Syn is a hunk but I just always find myself being angry at him when he's not around because he denies what we do/ have and just uses me for his personal needs which really really sucks. Although when in person I find my anger dissolving and forgiving him identical to the times previous even though I know he treats me like shit. My heart sort of says one thing while my brain another.

Its like I want to walk one way although my feet walk in the opposite direction.

I never used to "like" Syn until one drunken moment where we passionately kissed, since then I'd find myself thinking about him a little, that is up until we first slept together, after that moment, a bit more and more. He was the first guy I ever kissed or slept with, I presumed I was his first too, maybe thats why I cant stop him from running around my mind all the time.

Sleeping with Syn doesn't make me gay. I still like girls although I'm attracted to him, I don't like other men or boys... uggh what am I thinking? people want a sexual orientation to define you, even though nobody should care or need one! so guessing I like one guy and still like girls that makes me bisexual.

All this thinking is making me thirsty! I'd better go buy a couple more Jack Daniels I commanded myself. The rest of the guys -who disappeared to do their own stuff- left me stranded alone in the booth we had gotten. Standing up and making my way to the bar, I spotted Johnny, Jimmy and some Avenged fans chatting away in the corner booth. Those two must had told the fans they were together since the girls were gushing over them including the fact they kept stating how adorable they're together. They had plenty of drinks left but happy talking to the fans so I left to get on with it.

After ordering my drink and waiting for the bar tender to go fetch it, I kept hearing giggling from a woman behind me in one of the booths, this woman was very nasal even just her giggle was annoying as hell to hear. The man talking to her must have been saying some things to make her giggle that much, either that or she was laughing at me. Succeeding in paying for my drink, I turned around whilst glancing in the direction the from where the woman was sat, a pit formed in my stomach, my heart turned heavy like earlier in the hotel room.

It was Syn who was making her giggle.

My Syn.

I downed my whole drink there and then as soon as I felt tears start to prick at my eyes, not caring if it burnt my throat. Slamming my glass on the counter which resulted in a loud bang, I stomped out. Just because he might bring a girl back to his room, The same fucking room we'd slept together in less than 24 hours ago, doesn't mean it didn't hurt any less!.

"Dude, you okay???" Matt asked looking away from his phone, as I passed him. He must've been talking to Val. Completely ignoring him, tears streaming down my face, I carried on down the street towards our tour bus and went in, shutting the door behind myself. I launched myself onto my bunk, grabbed my pillow and broke down into it. After many tears and quiet sobs, with my head pounding, I drifted into an unwelcome sleep. I must have exhausted myself.