The Prince's Maid.

Chapter19

[Back to Andrea's POV]

However long I stayed in that horrible (yet comforting) darkness, I wasn't sure. Time just felt completely warped and almost like it was something that didn't really exist. Does time actually exist? Or is it something humans created to feel more secure about the hours in the day? Is it simply something that wouldn't be missed? I think so..

Thoughts would whirl around in my mind, a chain of them, allowing me to think the craziest of thoughts and feel like they belonged; purely because already, I was questioning the existance and reasoning of Time. Woah, now I'm saying it with a capital letter. Does that mean it's now a noun? Does being a noun mean that it really is just a name of the comfort that humans wanted? What if humans are minions and Time actually controls us, and that is why we fear it when we run out of time? Could that be possible? I think so...

I wasn't sure when I stopped taking notice of my thoughts. All I know is that I'm quite sure that some of them would have most definitely earned me a secure place in a mental institution. I wonder if all people in mental institutions have had these same thoughts about Time in their lifetime? Maybe that's another thing we fear about Time, meaning it rules us; the fact that life is so short. If I belonged in a mental institution, and everyone else in mental insititutions everywhere where saying similar things, is it a possibility that we have simply been enlightened? Maybe everyone in mental institutions (even if they haven't thought about Time) have all been enlightened to the true wonders of the world and the rest of us are in denial because we see the world as bad enough...if that was the case, then these people aren't dangerous at all are they? Because they can see the world a lot more clearly than the rest of us can, and they are simply warning us of all of this. They're the best people then aren't they? Why are they being locked up and getting treated?

Then again, what if they are mentally unstable and right now, I'm going insane? What if the darkness is taking my sanity and I'm starting to need to be put in a mental institution because I'm considering these things? Does that make me a bad person?

It seemed like hours had gone by while I just lay on the floor in blackness, enveloped in my own insecure questions. All I know is that at some point, my mind was at rest and my body was tired and relaxed, and sleep came to me. I dreamt of nothing, but I liked it that way. This kind of darkness didn't scare me, and instead it made me feel calm and at ease. I did not feel threatened by it at all.

When I awoke, I could hear voices outside of my door, and even though I couldn't make out the pitch of them (let alone what was being said), I knew it was most likely Adrian and Billy; purely because it always seems to be them that are there whenever I have one of my mini meltdowns. Sighing, I realised how stupid I was being. But then the day before came rushing back, and I felt angry all over again. Even though he hadn't technically done anything wrong, Adrian seemed like he was almost pressuring me into being okay, though I was far from it. Adrian had walked away from his family, and didn't seem to care whether they were okay or not. Sure, he'd been happy (excited even) when I told him that I knew both Tristan and Natalia. He'd joked a little when I was in shock about Caden. But not once had he asked about his parents. And when it came to my only living parent (who is dying, let me remind you), it seemed like he felt he could ask a few meaningless questions in an attempt to try and make me feel comforted and then it would all be okay. And then the same routine would happen when she...no, I can't think the word.

My stomach rumbled, breaking through the cascading waterfall of thoughts that were running through my mind. Looking down, I stared pointedly at my stomach as if to say 'shut up complaining, you'll live'. It listened at least.

Running a hand through my knotted hair, I sighed heavily. How was I supposed to be able to get food without talking to them? There had to be another way out of my room that they didn't know about, surely.