Camping for Morons ✓

02 : DREW BARRYMORE CAN SUCK IT

Camping Tip # 11: People don't understand how important it is to plan your camping trip beforehand. You have to know where you're going, what time you have to be there and most importantly who else is coming. After all, last thing anyone wants is to spend a weekend in the wilderness with someone you hate.

So, the whole reason my parents were even getting their vows renewed was because Mom saw this segment on The Marilyn Denis Show about Drew Barrymore's wedding and how it was this simple and traditional ceremony that happened over a weekend with close friends and family and how it was probably the most talked about wedding of the year. The fact it made it onto the cover of People magazine only made my mom squeal louder.

 She spent two straight days reading about the wedding, who was there, what did the venue look like, her wedding dress. My youngest sister made the mistake of asking Mom what her wedding was like and Mom got really emotional and took out the photo album. I was dragged into it and I had to sit for two hours as Mom guided me and Dione through every picture and the story behind it.

 Three days later, Callie came over to my house and we were both re-watching the fifth season of America's Next Top Model, when Mom barged into the living room and declared she was getting married. To Dad. Again. She said they were getting their vows renewed because it was romantic and it was going to be way better than Drew Barrymore's ever was.

I love the romance, the fact two people were agreeing to spend the rest of their lives to together in front of their family and friends was the most romantic thing ever. I always ended up crying during the wedding ceremony, usually around the time the bride and groom were declared man and wife. I loved seeing what the bride was wearing, my sisters and I would usually judge and rate their dress.

 Not to mention seeing the venue, and the food and especially the cake. It was a really emotional event for me and I loved every aspect of it. So when Mom said they would be renewing their vows it was the best thing I had heard all year. So the next two months I helped plan the wedding and it was really fun choosing what dress she was going to wear and the food and who was invited and best of all, I got to spend some quality with my mom.

 As much as I enjoyed planning this wedding with her, Mom was starting to get on my nerves. It was early April and the wedding was next month, on the second week of May and the closer it was, the more neurotic and just downright annoying my mom became. This camping trip Callie had suggested was a blessing. It would be great to have a break from the wedding plans.

After I came home from Lemon & Lime with Callie, I told Mom I was going camping. Actually, I waited until she was in a better mood and then I told her. I expected I would have to convince her and I had my argument all ready. My argument was mainly comprised of the fact I was sixteen and I would be entering the twelfth grade after the summer. To my surprise, when I told Mom of my plans to go camping with Callie, she smiled and said it was fine. Apparently I deserved a little break after all the help I had given her with the wedding.

        When, Tuesday afternoon rolled around, the day we'd decided to go camping, I was in my bedroom collecting the last of my things. Everybody was okay with me going, it was just my little sister who had a problem. Dione had been pestering me ever since she found out.

        "No!" she said, "you can't go!"

        "Calm down," I told her, "it'll only be for a few days."

        Dione pouted, "that's too long! I need you here!"

        "For what?" 

        She threw her arms in the air, "Stuff!"

        I laughed, "You know Di, as exciting as stuff sounds, I still need to go."