FORMIDABLE
I'm Sophia, 21 year old and a fresh graduate with a mountain high of debt because of my student loan. I came here after answering an add in a newspaper for a field researcher for a local company. The pay was not much, just enough to get me through but nevertheless it covers almost everything.
Looking back, on my first day I remember what I felt , though the building looks old and cold the office wasnt!. It was warm, friendly and the smell of salty caramel lingers in the thin air.
" Sophia, right?" asked the HR manager while studying me intently.
" Yes" the look in her eyes makes me wanna crawl back to the door.
" Sign up all these forms. READ them , so you wont go telling around I didn't know that and nobody told me this and blah, blah, blah. OK? " and then she flashes me a smile- a warm welcoming smile.
" And by the way, I'm Jane, you can ask me anything. I may not have all the answer but I can always share my knowledge". And that was it, we became a hit. We talked almost about everything sale, new tv series to watch, places to hang-out and sometimes gives me input in my research and a constructive criticism. Ms. Jane was like everybody's sister. She's 2 years my senior but she is wise beyond her years. Most of the girls go to her for advices. The life of the party. She doesn't engaged in our office talks, she works, she shrugs and she just ignore negativity all the time. Even our bosses are drawn to her. She's a combination of power, intellegence and sweetness.
Years passed, with deadlines to meet, people come and people go. Everything becomes passing. Sometimes we forget things that matters to us, like our humble begginings, life simple pleasure and the friends we meet along the way.
One September mourn, our boss came awfully early and woke up in the wrong side of the bed. Like a school kid caught up smoking, we all are in our toes. No one laughs, no one move, no one breath and to top of it all nobody can answer our boss except for Ms. Jane who's not even there either.
" Halley, do you know where Ms. Jane is?" I asked my research partner.
" She was just sitting there, oh wait! , maybe she's somewhere else sharpening pencils! I saw her last week sharpening a box of them. Who in the world has the time to do that? And the other week I saw her reading all our papers and those ones are for submission!" Halley rant .
" Hey, we are using those pencils but never sharpen them and she corrects our paper before it reaches the boss hand." with a sigh I replied to her.
At this moment, staplers are flying, papers are scattered and still no sign of Ms.Jane .
"Olivia!"
"Olivia!"
"Olivia, call Jane and tell her she has to be here within minutes or i'll rip her off!" Stephanie our boss now the monster, explodes at her assisstant. Minutes later after several attempts of contacting Ms. Jane , Stephanie back to her usual form found what she' s been looking for. It was neatly placed on her consule table with a post-it note that says 'IMPORTANT', of course Ms. Jane arranged it. Suddenly the phone rings. " Ms. Stephanie, it's for you" mumbled the terrified Olivia.
" Yes, this is Stephanie her superior"
" No, She didn't show up today, yesterday and the other day too!"
" Yes, I know, I am her emergency contact person here in the city"
" No, i haven't called her, I was very busy"
" Yes, I can take it!, what?"
" No!!! " Ms. Stephanie, scowls and started crying uncontrollably. And like a thief in the night, we all found out that Formidable Jane took her life. Ended it. There was no letter left, no diaries, no warnings. We search her house but we couldn't find anything. Nothing.
A month later, the office seems to start functioning again back to it's feet. Except for the fact that everybody's amiss. On the other hand, Olivia took the place of Ms. Jane and though things aren't the same she found the most important thing we've been searching for a long time. Olivia stumbled upon stacks of drafts written by Ms. Jane. One particular note says " Dear, I'm sorry if I have broken your mug I know it was given to you but you see, I've replaced it with a new one, same design and brand. I believe you have no right to raise your voice on me over that matter. You see, if I may, you used my utensils over and over without even washing them. I have told you many times, but you never paid attention. I don't have to get mad or raise my voice on you because I understand that you are under pressure with your job but then again , you have no right to raise your voice on me" then it hit me it was Halley! I was there when it happen, Halley was so angry that she stormed out in our lunch room knocking everything out and come to think of it, Ms. Jane and Halley are so close with each other. On one of Ms. Jane's inside cover leaf notebook, this, was written " Funny, how we treat each other, how we talk to each other, how we sometimes needs each other but fail too see beyond... Sometimes, we think we can say and do silly things without hurting each other. But the truth is- we express ourselves too much that we forgot we step, compete, make each other cry and sometimes drive each other over the edge". Drafts after drafts we read, written out of pain, hurt and anguish. All the time she kept it inside with love and understanding and when life's principle betrayed her, she took the final blow...
