The 'nerd' is dangerous

Traumatic loss

(Added February 2019) HA! Sorry guys!

Anna's POV:
The last few days have been hell. Colton's funeral was yesterday, his family, friends and almost the entire year; including teachers, had turned out to pay their respects. Annoyingly, so did the press, eager to get photos at the funeral of Colton Hughes, the teenager who killed a drug dealer, part of a gang and shoot dead by a rival gang. They weren't able to get inside the church but they were all waiting outside when the service ended.

The school has given me the week off for me to grieve in peace but it had the opposite effect. Once I finish the work they have sent me, I have nothing to do but think about him. The events of the last day with him plague my mind relentlessly, they flash in my eyes whenever I am not occupied with something, torturing me with my last moments with him; how he coughed up his own blood and fell limp in my arms, his lifeless eyes staring back at me.

My pregnancy has made everything even worse, my hormones and eating habits are crazy as well as my sleeping schedule going out of the window, I wake up at random hours and not able to go back to sleep, even if I do it isn't for long, nightmares occur ever night making me wake up distraught and tired. Izzy has moved into my room so that she can try to ease my nightmares and to make sure I'm not alone.

Since Colton's death I have moved back in with dad, neither of us wanted me to stay in me and Colton's house, every room had too many memories for me to stay in the house and dad didn't want me to be alone while I am in my fragile state. I'm not selling it but just moving out until I can bare to live there again, most likely once I give birth in just over six months.

Dad, Izzy, Sam, Jordan and Elle are the only ones who know about my pregnancy at this stage. They are the only ones I completely trust to help me through everything. They have been so understanding about everything, they give me comfort and advice when I need it as well as much needed space.

• • • • •

Today is the day I go back to school for the first time since Colton's death. Did my usual morning routine and got dressed into leggings, a loose grey t-shirt, one of Colton's hoodies, my glasses, a black beanie and converse.

Sam drove Izzy and I to school in her car, as soon as I saw the gates to school, my stomach lurched, not even my baby wanted to be there. The prospect of seeing everyone, their eyes full of pity and emotionless sympathy made me want to throw up and not due to morning sickness.

We walked into school with Sam and Izzy on either side of me so that I wouldn't need to be too close to anyone I didn't want to go near, especially people such as Brooke. Unfortunately, this plan would not protect me from her dramatically loud comments to her mindless bimbo minions.

"I just can't believe it, Colton's baby." She told them as we walked past her.

They were standing a few lockers away from mine during lunch, just as I went to my locker to collect my next classes folders and textbooks.

"I just like, can't believe you're like pregnant Brooke, you like only slept with him to like get back at that like nerd Alexandra for taking him away from you like seriously." Clone 1 replied twirling her hair in one hand.

I stopped getting my things out of my locker and put it all back in, too shocked to hold them securely. My hands shook, it can't be true, could it? Brooke pregnant with Colton's baby? I know they danced and kissed as part of truth or dare but he wouldn't do that, I trust him.