Scene 29: Elsa, then
She ran away.
--
Anger.
That was the only emotion that had registered in her brain when she'd done it—when she'd run away from home for the first time, not thinking, not caring.
The anger had been everywhere, too—in her thoughts, her dreams, her nightmares, her reality—and it had pricked at her chest whenever she'd stared at the sorrowful faces of her parents, or at the dreadfully dull purple canopy above her bed, or took the pills and the counselling that didn't really help, or listened to the advice she was suddenly getting from everyone about what she should and shouldn't do in her "fragile" mental state.
But most of all, she had been angry with herself—for closing the door, for closing it on Anna, for never telling her why she kept it shut, even when she was sent away, even after all the years since then.
Somehow, it had all manifested in that one escape, that act of incredible selfishness, and she'd felt it course through her veins like a comforting, dull pulse as she'd ordered the plane ticket in secret, and waited: waited for what seemed like ages until the day arrived and she'd stolen away in the middle of the night and hitched a cab to the airport, her heart thumping in an unusually slow way, filled with dread.
It hadn't helped that when she'd arrived there had still been hours to go before the flight, and in those hours, the quiet calm (no, dread) that had wound its way around her heart had released—and in its stead came the familiar rush of panic and fear that made her feel sick and coarse and utterly even though she'd tried not to think about what she was doing, or the people she was hurting, those damned feelings kept coming back to haunt her.
(To torment her.)
She'd gotten so caught up in it by the time Anna arrived—screaming in her ear, hugging her, crying against her shoulder—that she'd missed her plane entirely, barely registering the fact that it had been flying away right outside the window she was staring at.
It was too late by then, anyway; too late because she had thought too much, and felt too much, and yes, even cried too much to shed another tear, to cherish Anna's concern for her, to appreciate what she had and how little her life would mean without it.
It was too late, by then, to fill the emptiness.
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Aftermath
Fanfiction[Frozen; Modern AU; Hans x Elsa, Anna x Kristoff.] He was her sister's fiancé, then; but he wanted her, and Elsa wanted to let someone in-and now, he's a stranger, but she can't leave, because she needs him. She was engaged to the perfect guy, then;...
